The more you focus on the problem, the more detailed it becomes. Focus on the problem and it comes from every angle. If you are set on specific details of unwanted things that’s exactly what will come back to you. And it’s coming in a spiral 0f knowing what you don’t want and getting more of it. (Abraham Hicks, author, love her live talks a whole lot!)
Many people think I am secretive! My ex husband said it to me regularly, at family gatherings they shout across the table, “secret agent, pass the peas”! Sometimes I would laugh and other times I would scream under my breath! Me, secretive? Whatever do they mean? I am a bloody open book!
Now that I pay more attention I get it and last night it came up to me and tapped me on the shoulder, I prefer to stay quiet that talk to people who rain on the parade! You know the feeling of having an awesome idea that rocks the bottom of your belly? The kind that keeps you up at night? Then you say something and the response is “that is unrealistic” or some other type of dirty water thrown on it?
Last night I am having a discussion on my approach to the tenant and the dirty rain began. “You need to get tough”
“Why are being so nice to him and he’s being an A-hole?”
“Why don’t you ever stand up for yourself, people walk all over you”
Guys, guys can I try my approach first? This is why you guys call me secret agent! I prefer to start off nice, is that ok?
Now I know there needs to be a balance on nice and doormat, but I am of the strong belief that there are people out there who when they act out, act strange or like A-hole’s that it is a cry for love and attention and that it is an opportunity for me to move beyond some limiting belief that I also have!
It is my responsibility to respond in a way that keeps me peaceful. That is not to say I am advocating that people walk all over me or take advantage, sometimes the loving response is NO! But what I am saying is that I prefer and choose to focus on the solution and the most peaceful approach for all, if that means that people see me as soft and too nice then hey that’s really too bad!
Am I “positively addicted?” Hell yea, it’s a healthy high and makes me feel strong!
Dr. William Glasser wrote a book about it (in like, 1976), aptly named, Positive Addiction. “A positive addict uses his extra strength to gain more love and more worth, more pleasure, more meaning, more zest from life in general.” Sounds about right to me. And if that means that I am CIA, MI5, FBI, CID secret agent then hey what can I say!?!
Have a positive day y’all!