What did I learn today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

“You have to know yourself, well enough to trust yourself, well enough to be yourself and know that that’s enough.” — Onami When someone asks, Do you know yourself? what do you say? I’ve noticed that many of us respond with what we are not. “I’m not a morning person.” “I’m not into cars.” “I’m not a people person.” Or we reach for roles: “I’m a mother,” “I’m an accountant,” “I’m a wife.” Sometimes we name our struggles: “I’m anxious,” “I have anxiety,” “I’m messy.” But rarely do we answer from the inside out. Rarely do we say: I am curious. I am tender. I am resilient. I am joy. Why is that? The External Mirror It’s easy to define ourselves by what we do, who we’re with, or what we’ve survived. Careers, relationships, identities—they offer structure. They give us language. But they’re also temporary. If I am only “a wife,” what happens when the marriage ends? If I am “an entrepreneur,” who am when the business folds? I’ve learned that when I tie my sense of Self to something external,...

  Affirmation:   Even in uncertainty, I am rooted in grace. This month, I do not arrive with a plan. I arrive with presence. I do not demand certainty. I offer surrender. The grants have faded. The contracts dissolved. But I remain. Not as a fixed point, but as a living question. What does it mean to serve when the structure shifts? What does it mean to lead when the map disappears? October is not asking me to hustle. It is asking me to listen. To show up without armor. To feel without flinching. To trust that the ground beneath me, though unfamiliar, is still holy. I am not lost. I am being rerouted. I am not broken. I am being reformed. This month, I will not chase clarity. I will cultivate courage. I will not grasp for control. I will practice trust. I will show up. I will feel. I will be. Peace and Blessings ______________________________________________________________ Rooted in Obedience: A Companion Reflection Module: Courage & Belonging Sometimes courage looks like...

Affirmation:  Today, I choose presence over performance, trust over control, love over fear. I am rooted in awareness, and I return to myself with grace.  This week, I’ve been sitting with the ego. Not the kind that struts and boasts, but the quieter one—the negative ego. The one that whispers stories when I’m not paying attention. The one that pulls me out of presence and into performance. I’ve noticed how it shows up: In the need to know everything—before, during, and after. In the distraction that feels like urgency. In the craving for external validation, applause, approval. In the stories I make up to feel safe, seen, superior. When I listen to the negative ego, I act from fear. I compare. I control. I conquer. I want to win—at all costs. And the cost is high. Peace becomes scarce. Confusion becomes familiar. Connection becomes conditional. This week, my practice has been self-awareness. Noticing when I slip into fear. Noticing when I speak out of turn. Noticing when I ju...

  Reflections on the Nina Documentary Launch – Sunday 21st September 2025 Affirmation:  Obedience births alignment. Trust the nudge. There was no budget. Let me start there. No grand sponsor, no overflowing account. Just a deep knowing: this must happen. The launch of the Architects of Change documentary was more than an event—it was a calling. A whisper from the Most High that said, share these stories. And so, I listened. I wrote to a few corporate companies. Some responded, some didn’t. I wasn’t discouraged. I was determined. And then, on a quiet Saturday morning walk along the beach—my usual rhythm—her name came to me: Tisha Jack, founder of TCJ Events. Now, I hadn’t spoken to Tisha in years. A brief hello two years ago, nothing more. But the nudge was clear: Call her. So I did. She gave me a quote—beautiful, but beyond what we could pull together. I was honest. She was gracious. Her words: “Have no fear. We will make it happen.” And happen it did. The venue was transforme...

Affirmation: I show up with intention. I stand on my values. I honor myself and others in every exchange.  Lately I have been practicing to  ask myself: What is my intention? Not just in the big, sweeping gestures—but in the quiet moments, the conversations, the choices made when no one is watching. To me, intention is not a vague hope or a distant goal. It’s a living compass. It asks: • What am I hoping to achieve? • What am I hoping to share with those around me? When I move with intention, I move with clarity. I am less likely to be swayed by the need to please or perform. I am more likely to stand rooted in truth. Living My Values My values are what I stand on. They are the quiet truths I carry whether the world is watching or not. • I value kindness—not as niceness, but as a radical act of care. • I value mutual respect—where dignity is not earned, but honored. • I value authenticity—even when it’s uncomfortable, even when it’s not liked. These values are not ju...

Affirmation : I honor the process  When we’re called to do something new—whether through prayer, intention, or a quiet whisper from within—what’s the first thing we focus on? For many of us, it’s what we don’t have. What we can’t do. What must be perfect before we begin. We start scanning for certainty, for guarantees, for ease. We want the path to unfold exactly how we imagined it—smooth, predictable, affirming. And when it doesn’t, fear creeps in. Doubt takes the mic. We start rehearsing reasons to delay, to shrink, to wait for “the right time.” But here’s what I’ve learned: Anything new comes with a process. And that process will ask something of you. It might ask for discomfort. It will definitely ask for discipline. It may ask you to stretch, to stumble, to start again. There is no shortcut to transformation. If I want to get healthy, I have to move my body. If I want to learn Spanish, I have to practice. If I want to grow—spiritually, professionally, personally—I have to show...

Affirmation -  Presence is my power source Lately, I’ve been asking myself—what’s taking up bandwidth? Not just time or attention, but the deeper current of energy that fuels how I show up in the world. Is it overthinking? Future thinking? Emotional labour? Energetic dependence? It’s astonishing how easily the mind slips—into the future, into the past, into loops of what-ifs and should-haves. We rehearse conversations that haven’t happened, replay ones that already did. We try to solve what isn’t ours to hold. And in doing so, we abandon the only place where life is actually happening: here. Now. Presence isn’t passive. It’s a practice. A training. A remembering. I have to remind myself—daily, hourly sometimes—to return. To breathe. To feel my feet on the ground. To notice what’s in front of me, not what’s behind or ahead. Because the energy of presence is powerful. It’s what allows us to make decisions that are rooted—not reactive. It’s what helps us choose from clarity, not fear....

There’s a quiet revolution unfolding—and it begins with you. I created Rooted for the woman who’s ready to stop shrinking.   For the one who’s tired of betraying herself to belong.  For the one who knows that joy is not frivolous—it’s revolutionary. This 4-week online immersion is a homecoming to your truth, your boundaries, your joy.   Each week, we’ll explore a theme that invites you to return to your center: - Week 1: Rooted in Self-Awareness   - Week 2: Rooted in Courage & Joy   - Week 3: Rooted in Boundaries   - Week 4: Rooted in Belonging You’ll receive guided reflections, affirmation cards, journaling spreads, and live sessions designed to help you reclaim your voice, your rhythm, and your sacred no. We begin October 5.   Registration is now open. If you’ve been waiting for a sign—this is it.   Your yes is sacred. Your truth is welcome here. Peace and Blessings Save Your Spot

  I am safe. I choose discernment over fear. I trust myself to stay. What Does “Uncommitted” Mean to Me? I’ve been sitting with this word lately—uncommitted. Not in the dictionary sense, but in the way it lands in my body. To me, it means someone who jumps ship when something shinier comes along. Someone who abandons the cause, the conversation, the community—without warning, without weight. It’s not about them, really. It’s about how I feel when it happens. I’ve noticed that when people around me act uncommitted, I react. I cut them off. I move on. I tell myself I’m protecting my peace, but underneath that is a deeper truth: I want to feel safe. And when someone leaves, I feel abandoned. I’ve been learning not to take things personally. I’ve been practicing self-awareness—not to judge myself because when I don't judge myself I don't judge others, but to understand the why behind my reactions. So now, when I feel that sting of someone pulling away, I ask: • Are you safe? • ...

  Rooted Series | A 4-week online immersion begins October 5 There’s a quiet revolution unfolding—and it begins with you. I created Rooted for the woman who’s ready to stop shrinking. For the one who’s tired of betraying herself to belong. For the one who knows that joy is not frivolous—it’s revolutionary. This 4-week online immersion is a homecoming to your truth, your boundaries, your joy. Each week, we’ll explore a theme that invites you to return to yourself with grace and clarity:  Week 1: Rooted in Self-Awareness  Week 2: Rooted in Courage & Joy Week 3: Rooted in Boundaries  Week 4: Rooted in Belonging  We begin October 5. Registration opens soon. For now, save the date—and begin listening for the yes inside you. Peace and Blessings Akosua Dardaine Save Your Spot

In the presence of eternity, the mountains are as transient as the clouds . Robert Green Ingersoll Sunday mornings have taken on a new rhythm. A new challenge. I lace up my shoes, press play on my soca playlist, and head out into what we lovingly call “the bush.” Trees stretch tall like elders, rivers hum low like secrets, and the bike trails twist and turn like stories waiting to be told. It’s absolutely lovely. And it’s mine. I stopped running just before Covid. A shoulder injury slowed me down, and then the world did too. But now, I’m back. And soca—sweet, pulsing, unapologetic soca—has become the soundtrack to my return. Without it, I feel lost. Slow. Like I’ve forgotten the beat of my own body. But this morning was different. As I ran deeper into the bush, off the road and into the quiet, I felt a tug. Not in my shoulder, but in my spirit. A gentle nudge to take the music off. To be present. . To run without distraction. To run with myself. And so I did. The run continued, but som...

I am seen. I am significant. I do not need to perform to belong.  Last Sunday, I found myself triggered. I was at a workshop, and something in the room made me feel... unseen. Ignored. My instinct was to do something—to retreat, to isolate, or to make myself visible in ways that didn’t feel aligned. But instead, I did something radical. I paused. I took a sacred pause. In that stillness, I asked myself: Why am I feeling this way? What surfaced was fear—fear of being seen as unimportant by this group. My negative ego had slipped into the driver’s seat, whispering stories rooted in scarcity and self-doubt. But was that story true? No. I realized I didn’t need validation from anyone in that setting. My worth wasn’t up for negotiation. I let it go. And I was proud of myself. This was one of the first times I chose the pause over the performance. I didn’t act out. I didn’t shrink or shout. I simply sat with the discomfort and looked at the bigger picture.   Why the Sacred Pause Mat...

   “ Let’s keep reminding each other: our stories survive because we continue to tell them. Period.” Ava DuVernay  Reading that Ava quote, It felt like a whisper from my grandmother’s kitchen.. Not because it was new, but because it was familiar. It reminded me of something I had always known but had, somewhere along the way, tucked into the back pocket of life’s busyness: I am a storyteller. I come from storytellers. And stories are how we survive. I grew up in the presence of voices that painted worlds. Women who could turn a simple pot of soup into a parable. Elders who didn’t just recount events—they passed on wisdom, encoded in laughter, caution, and grace. I learned how to listen before I learned how to speak. And when I finally spoke, I realized I was echoing generations. But life, as it does, got loud. Got fast. Got practical. And somewhere in the shuffle of building programs, shaping policy, and navigating transitions, I forgot that storytelling wasn’t just a to...

Part of courage is simple consistency - Peggy Noonan   I started going to a boxing class. Five days a week. It’s intense. The kind of intense that makes you question your life choices mid-combination. I struggle—let’s be clear. Compared to the other participants, I’m often behind. My feet don’t always follow the rhythm, and the fitness tests? Let’s just say they test more than my fitness. But I show up. Every day, I hear my name echoing through the gym. “More power on those bags, Akosua!” “More speed, Akosua!” “Akosua, Akosua!” Sometimes I smile in annoyance, thinking, Can’t he see I’m flat out and ready to faint? But I keep punching. I keep moving. I keep showing up. Last week, after a group session, the trainer said, “I want to give a prize for the most consistent boxer here. Rain or shine, I know this person will show up. Y’all be like Akosua.” Me? I was shocked. Pleasantly surprised. A little embarrassed. I didn’t win for speed or strength or technique. I won for consistency. O...

  "Your whole life is a manifestation of the thoughts that go on in your head." - Lisa Nichols  Rev Deborah L Johnson , one of my favorite spiritual teachers, says  that one of our most sacred responsibilities is to mind our mind—to be consciously aware of our thoughts and how we choose to direct that energy. It’s a call to presence, to stewardship of the unseen currents that shape our lives. Because whether we notice it or not, our thoughts are always making an imprint. They ripple outward, forming the architecture of our reality. How many times do we realize that the thoughts we place the most energy on, manifests itself into reality - whether we want it or not?  So why do we not pay attention? Why do we allow our thoughts to run unchecked, as if they were background noise rather than the blueprint of our becoming? I believe in the energy. I believe that what we think and say is where we are living. Our thoughts are not passive—they are generative. They are the qu...

  “ When you abandon yourself to please others, you teach the world that your truth is negotiable.” — Unknown There are moments when the world aligns in such a way that it feels like a whisper from the universe—a gentle nudge to pay attention. Today, the beach offered me one of those moments. The fishermen were already out on their boats when I arrived, casting nets, pulling ropes, calling out to one another in words I couldn’t understand but whose meaning was clear: Here, take this. I’ve got you. Let’s work together. There was grace in their labor, a kind of poetry in the way they bent and lifted, in the way the sea accepted their efforts without complaint. And then—just above them—a rainbow, as if placed there just for them. For a moment, I stood frozen, struck by the sheer beauty of it: these men, doing the most ordinary of work, bathed in something extraordinary. How Many Rainbows Do We Miss? How often do we rush through our days without seeing the magic woven into the mundane?...

 Rather than think about what you have to do to change a situation, consider what the situation might be doing to change you. How it might be seasoning and transforming and growing you. You are not responsible for everything and everyone. Allow that as a possibility. Jessica Dore There are some situations that don’t come into your life to stay. They show up like quiet teachers, nudging you to shift, stretch, evolve. They whisper of change, even when you’re desperately clinging to what’s familiar. You say you want to grow—but are you ready to release? You say you long for transformation—but have you made peace with the discomfort of the unknown? Let’s be honest: loss is terrifying. We grieve even the things we no longer want. The familiar, no matter how confining, wraps itself around us like family. It becomes our safety net, our story, our shield. But maybe it’s time to redefine “lose.” What If Loss Is Just a Beginning? I don’t say I lost my house anymore. I don’t say I lost my ma...

“Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better. ” –Albert Einstein Yesterday, the Nina ladies took on a short but spirited hike to the breathtaking Zorro Falls. What began as a physical challenge quickly unfolded into a living classroom—one where nature, uncertainty, and sisterhood taught us more than any indoor session could . We use these outdoor journeys as practical learning spaces: to explore how we navigate challenges, embrace uncertainty, and show up for one another with both strength and softness. And this hike delivered all of that—with a splash of fun and a whole lot of heart. There were moments that tested us: slippery rocks, steep climbs, and the rope-assisted ascent up the falls—the easiest way up, but still no small feat. What stood out most was the cheering. The genuine, soul-deep encouragement that echoed through the trees as each woman tackled the terrain. It was a reminder that support isn’t just about lending a hand—it’s about believing in eac...