Showing posts from July, 2019

Perfection is a Trap

If you feel like you don’t have it all together, trying living that instead making your life about the ever constant fixing of that. Maxie McCoy

Who said that we had to have all together- all the time?
Well who told me that anyway?
Has anyone told you that?
Especially as an adult. The expectation is as an adult, we need to have our shit sorted, to have it all together. And if we don't somehow we are relegated to the pile of immature, acting like a child and some may go as far as  to call us crazy!

I have learnt that this constant push towards fixing and perfection is a trap.
It messes with our heads, especially if it involves peddling products to "fix" us! make us more pretty, more handsome, more curvy, more shapely, more educated, more smart and on and on and on...
I have learnt that life will do whatever is required to heal you. life you, save you or get your attention. Many times that involves doing things that may be uncomfortable. Acceptance and knowing makes the process o…

A Time For Everything

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8, NIV)” I love this quote. It always reminds me that there are seasons, that nothing stays the same. Nature also reminds me of this. There are seasons. There is a time for planing and for reaping There is a time for rain and for sun When I get frustrated by a process and the time it is taking to achieve or manifest something I am reminded that there is a time. If we use our rest time to work, there will be consequences and vice versa The lessons that come with the timing of events include having faith, having patience,and trusting the process I know that rain cannot fall everyday I know that the sun will not shine everyday I know that there will be a time for both and with that I can rest assured that what shows up in my life is diving timing and adjust accordingly!
Check out the We Lead PowHerful Conference - I will be there
Have you read any of Akosua…

Love Everything

At every chapter, a soul appears on my path and becomes my best teacher for what's next. We are always guided and it's almost magical to see how life constantly sends someone to take us by the hand and walk with us through what we fear the most.I'm immensely grateful. - Valencia

Being around the young ladies in the NiNa Young Women's Leadership Programme has taught me that people are in our lives to teach us or for us to teach them. We may not know it at the onset but I truly believe that ultimately we are all students and teachers sometimes all at once.
A beautiful thing happens when we have determined from early in the interaction what our role is. We can respond accordingly.

Sometimes our lessons are easy and other times our lessons are challenging.
Sometimes our lessons are fun and sometimes they require some slogging or tears.

This past week reconfirmed to me that what makes all of this even more worthwhile is love. Love everything! Love is different to like, you can …

People who Listen to themselves feel good

When you start to care about yourself on a soul level, you start listening to what you have to say to yourself. You listen to your emotions. You learn from them and they offer you a perspective that your mind cannot even fathom. People who listen to themselves, feel good. Thandiwe

Day 5 - NiNa Young Women's Leadership Programme

Today the young ladies were to do a business pitch before a panel of judges. They had 3 minutes to present their idea and 2 minutes for questions.
They arrived early, looking very professional, dressed up and immediately started practising their pitches. Tempers started flaring up, they started arguing, asking to leave, feeling sick.
I had a word with a couple of them, it did not seem to be helping
We lost 2, they bowed under the pressure!
The others, after their heated exchange decided to patch things up and do their pitches
They were brilliant, it was an absolute joy to watch. The work they put in was evident in their presentations
I could not be more pleased



Nothing from Nothing leaves you with nothing but trust - 3 Canal
Day 4 of the NiNa Programme Decisions... Do you plan your work, or do you work your plan? Are you waiting for another man’s plan to work? To hold out your hand? Do you pray when you are broke or do you build with the Gods? Are you fly by night or are you a fair-weather friend? Or are you the type a friend can depend on until the end? Have you ever sat back and thought about how your life can change overnight? Do you waste your time, or do you spend it wise? Do you dream for steam or only when you close your eyes? 16 young ladies 5 mentors (past participants) 3 Angels( Patricia & Avinash & Erica) 1 powerhouse friend who went to the Olympics - 4 times because build something from no-thing
Check out the We Lead PowHerful Conference - I will be there
Have you read any of Akosua's work? What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are Yo…

My meaning of going all in

Talk to anyone who has a commitment to excellence and a few common themes will emerge:

willingness to take responsibility for your intentions, actions, behaviors, responses, attitudes in every single situation.
making a decision to face all fears, directly, rather than fighting them away or pretending that they aren’t there.
intentionally finding ways to make small but consistent progress. Kate Courageous

Day 2

The annual NiNa  Young Women's Leadership Programme has begun
Every year we host young ladies at a 7 day residential with the aim of providing a safe space for them to bloom! This year we have expanded the programme, we have opened the circle and changed the venue. A lot of changes all at once.
What did I learn today?

Going all in doesn't mean changing everything over night. 
Going all in can simply mean you're 100 percent committed to showing up.
to using what you have,
to being patient,
to trusting the process.
to being flexible
to learn
& that's how we build & rebui…

Lessons from Grand Bahama Island

Everyone in the world is searching to fill a perceived emptiness. This emptiness is not clearly defined in our thinking because there is nothing in the world that will fill it. ACIM

Hello loveys

How are you?
It's been a hot minute since I checked in, it seems that the last few days flew by. I was in the Bahamas for an event and the schedule was packed, packed, packed
I had the absolute honour and pleasure to speak at the Rose Edition - The Power of Her Story 
12 absolutely fabulous women sharing their stories openly and authentically.
The power of it moved me
These are my lessons from the past few days on Grand Bahama Island

1. Go with the flow - The flights were delayed - like for hours - like for more than 5 hours. The schedule said I had to be at an event 2 hours after arrival - that did not happen and my worry did not make it happen either.

2. Be Present - I made a conscious decision to put the phone down when listening and speaking to people - huge difference being fully in the space …

When you believe something, you have made it true for you

“When you believe something, you have made it true for you.”  When we try to hold opposing thought systems as both true, our mind becomes split, conflicted and confused. ACIM

What do you believe?
What do you believe about you?
What do you believe about the world?
What do you believe about YOUR world?

If you don't know what you believe, look at your actions, look at your life
Your actions and your life reflect your beliefs
and the beautiful thing about this is if you can acknowledge that then you are on your way to peace
If you acknowledge and accept that your beliefs are working, then you can enjoy the moment, you can take the gifts and lessons into a new adventure, you can share.
If you can acknowledge and accept that your beliefs are not working, you can make movements to replace those beliefs with ones that work. Not working means - you are not living a peaceful life.

Your beliefs are true for you. and therefore you will live from that space
What do you believe?


Check out the We Lead…

What Are Your Green Flags?

Everyone warns you about red flags in a relationship but I want to hear about green flags.What’s some green flags for you? - Boi McCoy

Here are some of the ones I dig:

1. Allowing silence - sitting in silence without feeling the need to full it up with chatter, music, small talk, noise

2. Going with the flow when things are seemingly out of control - bump up to a challenge - flow rather than fold

3. Putting down the toilet seat - yea I said that!

4. Being kind to people and animals

5. Being kind to children and babies

6. Self Belief even when the doubts come
7. Loving Nature

8. Loving Sports

9. Willingness to forgive, communicate and move on

10. Making Quality time just for us - without a phone

12. Have genuine friends

13. Makes time for rest and fun

14. Keeps it real - an authentic person - no performance masks

15. Practices gratitude and generousity

Check out the We Lead PowHerful Conference - I will be there
Have you read any of Akosua's work? What Did I L…

Celebrate the Small Wins

Take one step towards doing something you have been thinking about. Speak to yourself calmly, firmly. Do things that are in alignment with your thinking. Celebrate any little progress you make.Iyanla Vanzant

A friend and I were chatting about getting to our goals, how do we move to the next step, when do we know it's time to do something different. It dawned upon me then that many times we do not in any way celebrate our small wins, postponing it for a big win. It also dawned on me that many small wins can add up to a big win.

Celebrating the small wins makes the journey easier, makes it fun. Who can be serious all the time without feeling burnt out? The fun part gives us an impetus to move ahead with some more joy happiness in the mix.
I truly believe that celebrating the small victories is a part of the journey. Celebrate them and then get back down to work.

Check out the We Lead PowHerful Conference - I will be there
Have you read any of Akosua…

Rediscover Your Personal Medicine

if you whisper your own name and picture what it means, you will rediscover your personal medicine - Jamie Sams

I have an unusual name for where I live. I live outside of the African continent and my name originated from Africa. At school I was teased about it, teachers and students struggled to pronounce it and the spelling was butchered time and time again. Added to that my second name was long and changed twice.

When I was in school I got into a couple of fights because of the teasing, after a while I withdrew and started using a nickname to avoid the drama. As fate would have it I was teased about my nick name as well.

As I grew up, I started making up stories that if my name is unique, then I must also be unique. That changed the game for me. I started embracing the name with more confidence and love. It changed the way I started saying it out loud
I also learnt about letting things go. If I got upset or ran around to everyone who teased me, misspelt my name and made fun of me it wo…

You will be presented with lessons

"You will be presented with lessons. Life is a constant learning experience, which every day provides opportunities for you to learn more. These lessons are specific to you, and learning them 'is the key to discovering and fulfilling the meaning and relevance of your own life'.There are no mistakes, only lessons. Your development towards wisdom is a process of experimentation, trial and error, so it's inevitable things will not always go to plan or turn out how you'd want. Compassion is the remedy for harsh judgement - of ourselves and others. Forgiveness is not only divine - it's also 'the act of erasing an emotional debt'. Behaving ethically, with integrity, and with humour - especially the ability to laugh at yourself and your own mishaps - are central to the perspective that 'mistakes' are simply lessons we must learn Lessons repeat until learned Learning does not end " Cherie Scott 

blessings are everywhere. I could embrace the deep tr…


memories are a dangerous thing to be in love with. i hope you learn to discern the difference between the love you have for someone, and the love you have for the moments you spent together. Billy Chapata

It's a challenge to change habits, to change a life, to change what we are used to. Many times we remember the fond times, the memories and tell ourselves that maybe just maybe we can have a moment like that again. We convince ourselves that maybe things will change, the situation will change, the person will change. And yes, sometimes that happens, and sometimes it does not happen.
The challenge happens when nothing changes, not even you!
Then the pleasant memories start becoming fleeting, they start being the exception, we continue to hang on to the hope and remember those times.

I have learnt that everyone is inherently a loving soul. Sometimes they don't know how to display it, or sometimes they have forgotten. People in our lives are all teachers and mirrors. When do we know…

I choose...

I believe that we are solely responsible for our choices, and we have to accept the consequences of every deed, word, and thought throughout our lifetime.” Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

I choose
I choose peace over chaos & I’m proud of my choice
I choose spirituality over religion, &I’m proud of my choice
I choose real over phony & I’m proud of my choice
I choose to dream more dreams than live in a nightmare & I’m proud of my choice
I choose to embrace real life over getting lost in a fantasy & I’m proud of my choice
I choose divine guidance over external validation & I’m proud of my choice
I choose courage over fear & I’m proud of my choice
I choose bake period.
I choose consistency & discipline over speed and fads & I’m proud of my choice
I choose to wait rather than settle & I’m proud of my choice

Check out the We Lead PowHerful Conference - I will be there
Have you read any of Akosua's work? What Did I Learn Today? Lessons…

It Takes a Village

A family is a patchwork of individuals tied together by heartstrings - Kav L'Noar
In everything I do, I am blessed and ever so grateful to have a village surrounding me. I have learnt that we cannot do everything alone, that there is a time and place for everything.
A time to give and a time to receive. We have to learn when is the time for both and move accordingly.
The NiNa Programme is no different, the village of Pat and Avinash surround me making this journey so much richer and rewarding.
On 23rd July  2019, we have another opportunity to interact with young ladies who always show up and teach me about unconditional love, the power in respecting others and that non judgement has an impact on decisions made.
It is never an easy road hoping on the Journey however, knowing that there is a Village is worth the trip.
I Give Thanks
§NiNa is a programme targeting young ladies between the ages of 15 to 18 who reside at the St Jude’s Home for Girls. - A Care Hom…

First thing to Remember is...

First thing to remember is... you ARE the one - Louise Hazel

My grandma said last night " be number one in your world, be your own hero, be your love" that resonated with me.
It resonated because so many times we look on the outside for our number one's, for the most important thing in our lives, and here it is, right there, we are the the ones we look for
It resonated with me because this thinking will not let me off the hook by looking outside of myself and blaming others for answers to the questions that I know
It resonated with me because it simply is the truth - it is the truth for all of us, we are the hero's in our own story. We are all the lead actors

Check out the We Lead PowHerful Conference - I will be there
Have you read any of Akosua's work? What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here? Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal
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