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Friday, 19 December 2014

Resist the urge to drag them back

We may cling to the irrational belief that things are good enough in the relationship - that we feel a measure of security and that this is as good as it's likely to get. In the process, however, we give up the chance to explore our sense of fulfillment in life. We give up our own life dreams in order to maintain the security of a relationship. Symmonds

I'm no relationship expert, trust me I'm not! I have been learning lessons as I go along! And learning is to do! 

Opportunities come up again and again to see what I have learnt, and as I now know for sure, to know is to do! 

When you look at that person as well as the other people in your life, they are a reflection of the relationship you are having with yourself. Some of us cannot see the detrimental, unflattering things we do to ourselves. What I have learnt is that many of us believe that the problems in our lives, the problems in our relationships are the fault most of the time of the men in our lives. That man in your life is you. He is your mirror image. Catch that!

When you bring yourself to order, everyone in your environment will follow suit, or they will leave you. If they leave you, resist the urge to run after them and drag them back! 


Thursday, 18 December 2014

Can I?

Every positive change--every jump to a higher level of energy and awareness--involves
a rite of passage. Each time to ascend to a higher rung on the ladder of personal
evolution, we must go through a period of discomfort, of initiation. I have never
found an exception."

- Dan Millman

Note to self:
Can I continue to complain about what I do not have, cannot do, criticizing myself and others? Or can I take a chance, find an opportunity and know in my heart what I want to do is possible?
 Can I?

Can I continue to buy into the belief that there is not enough, settling for whatever I can get? Or can I do my best in every situation, expecting the best from every situation, recognizing that what I put out must come back to me tenfold? 
Can I?

Can I blame the world, hate my enemy, feel sorry for myself as an excuse for what not to do what I desire to do? Or can I raise my consciousness , pour love into every situation and take responsibility for myself? Can I? Can I? Can You?

Wednesday, 17 December 2014

Asketh please.....

It isn't always easy to express our desires. We worry that others will see us as pushy or demanding, or that we'll be turned down. But asking for what you want is a necessary part of life, and I've found that the more you practice it, the easier it becomes. Iyanla Vanzant

Hands up if you can identify with Miss Iyanla! Right now my both hands are up! And give yourself a huge round of applause if you ask for what you want! Bravo!!!

Listen, me? I am learning this! I was always the "nice cool one" and I bought into that wholesale! So now that the label was on how could I be what the masses would call "pushy" and so it went! Proverbial shit had to hit the fan for me to ask! Let the peace be!!!

So I've been practice it why? because practice leads to mastery and when you practice sometimes it gets tough but you continue and you get better at it!

So, ask without fear, be prepared to hear no and have a plan when you do, be committed and most of all love yourself through it all

Tuesday, 16 December 2014

Can you own that?

Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our time running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous. Giving up on love and belonging and joy – the experiences that make us most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to expose our darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light. (Brene Brown,author)
She asked me "can you own that?" and that was a tough question for me because I went straight into  blame and projection mode!
"Can you own that?" a simple question that causes me to pause, reflect inward and then choose a response!
"Can you own that?" facing up to my own part in what is going on in my life! The awesome and the not so awesome!
If it's going on in your life you have a part to play in stopping or continuing it! If its going on in your life yea, it is about you! Why? because you get to choose the response, not always what happens, but the response 
Can I own that?
Yea I will!
Owning my stuff today! 

Monday, 15 December 2014

What happens when you resist?

Then you learn about love. You learn to look at relationships as
they really are and not as you would have them be. You learn that alone does not mean lonely.

You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes. You
learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO.

You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside,
smoothing things over and ignoring your needs.

The Awakening

The need to be right, the need to be in control! Two things that human beings fight tooth and nail for! Including me! No one likes to be wrong! Right??

But I have learnt the constant need for those two things robs you of a peaceful existence and I am not saying to take everything anyone dishes out to you! Throughout life we develop ideas on how others should be, how they should behave, and how they should treat us. When things are not as we think they should be we resist! 
People will be who they be! Good luck in trying to change them! What you can do is choose! 

Iyanla says is so well " Do not tell yourself that you do not feel what you feel, simply surrender it to your God self and ask that your thoughts and emotions be harmonized and brought into alignment for your highest good"

Today I surrender to my highest self, my god self because I have learnt that what you resist persist! I am going out in the world today with the attitude that I do all that I can do to the best of my abilities, and when I get to that point I let it go and in all of that I love myself, honour myself and accept things as they are!

Happy Monday peeps!

Saturday, 13 December 2014


“Ten times a day something happens to me like this – some strengthening throb of amazement – some good sweet empathic ping and swell. This is the first, the wildest and the wisest thing I know: that the soul exists and is built entirely out of attentiveness.”  Mary Oliver

The clock is ticking, the book deadline is looming near, the adrenaline is flowing, the pressure is building, the fear is growing, the expectation is high! In between it all, I want to do something everyday that brings me joy, to enjoy the little things so I committed to do this as of Now, go to the beach, whatever it is, I am committed!

What are your big goals, dreams, and how are you balancing that with the joy and attentiveness that life is about?

Have an awesome weekend! I'm going for the joy by watching a whole load of footie!!!


Friday, 12 December 2014


"People typically struggle with boundaries because they find it difficult to hurt someone else’s feelings, or they get caught up in the desire to change the other person or make them treat them the way they want to be treated. This never works." 
Mark Manson

A great buddy of mine sent me an article yesterday from Mark Manson and the quote above hit me like whadaappp!! like a slap in the face because it spoke directly to me! (Thanks B for the article!)

We can't change people! Let people be who they are and then you get to choose if you want to be around them! And while you are choosing you get to learn some awesome lessons of acceptance, patience, compassion and unconditional love - of yourself and others!
But try to change someone or have no boundaries to give them hints, ideas, options of how to treat you is setting up yourself for hurt and frustration, you cannot argue with reality, you will suffer!
So what's real? Real is what is happening right now, right in front of your face! Not the stories we make up about what is happening!

Choosing is usually a kick in the shin, it's upheaval but hey most times a change or birth involves some discomfort!
All this to say to myself! Choose!!!!!!!!!!!!



Thursday, 11 December 2014

Do you know?

Why are you doing it?

Why? ... the work... the projects... the places... the worship... the people... the living... the shopping... the reading, listening, watching... the time... the giving... the inviting... the caring... the carrying... the praying... the staying... the making.
Why ya doing it? Danielle La Porte

Back in Port of Spain! It feels good! I called my grandma when I got in, she answered her voice was sounding nice and strong! She welcomed me back, said she's better,  said nothing will  beating her down anytime soon, started talking politics so I knew! Oh yeah she's feeling good! It's on! I better sit down, the conversation will be a long one!

She asked me if I spent time with my folks!  I told her but of course! she said I am Happy that you did .I told her I have something for her from them, she got quiet! She said you know, my grandchildren don't have to bring me anything, I remember when Sana was in college I was there with her right through and all it is for me is that she has graduated, that's enough! When you are on the move you need people and an environment that supports and encourages you. You won't find that among people who are helpless and hopeless.
Hmm I thought! Yes Sheils, preach!

Blessings flow!


Wednesday, 10 December 2014

Why are you here?

Houston is good to me! A shot of inspiration hit me yesterday, OMG! I started writing and literally it was flowing like a river on a rainy day! The love I feel, it just came through me and manifested itself in words! I felt the excitement for my new book coming out early next year, I felt a connection to my authentic self, and what I have learnt is that your authentic self is the foundation of my power! 

"Nyabo (Madam) Why are you Here?" - the title of my new book! I'm overfull with excitement and gratitude, you guys are the first that I have shared this with, I woke up with that vibe!

Look out for it! Coming soon!