What did I learn today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

  No amount of money, no thinking you are special, no place you live no amount of anything allows you to break any law of nature Carolyn Myss As 2024 comes to a close, I find myself reflecting on the profound lessons this year has bestowed upon me. This journey of discovery and growth has taught me invaluable truths about nature, stillness, healing, and the art of simply being. Here are the key experiences and lessons that have shaped my year. I made a commitment to go to the ocean and the forest every weekend. I surprised myself to keeping that commitment baring travel or adverse weather. Nature Has All the Answers Throughout the year, I have turned to nature for guidance and solace. Whether it's the rhythmic sound of ocean waves, the rustling leaves in a forest, or the tranquility of walking to the river on Sunday, nature has a way of providing clarity and answers. Every question I posed to the universe seemed to find its response in the natural world. Nature's wisdom is bou...

   Not only is it important to have gratitude for your body that is allowing you the opportunity to experience life but being diligent about finding what actually helps nourish your body will make every aspect of your life easier. Yung Pueblo  In life, there are moments that test our resolve and redefine our sense of self. For me, one such moment was a serious shoulder injury that threatened to end my love for boxing forever. The journey from despair to rediscovery has taught me invaluable lessons about trust and belief—in both my body and my mind. When I first sustained the shoulder injury, I felt helpless and afraid, not only did it impact boxing, it impacted living- driving, how I slept, lifting, dressing myself were all put on pause. Boxing, which had been a source of strength, discipline, and joy, suddenly seemed out of reach. The physical pain was immense, but the emotional turmoil was even greater. I was faced with the prospect of never stepping into the ring agai...

  There are no small choice s -Carolynn Myss  The Power of Choice: Every Decision Shapes Our Life Life is a series of choices, each one weaving the intricate tapestry of our existence. Often, we underestimate the significance of the decisions we make, viewing them as small or inconsequential. However, the reality is that there are no small choices; each decision, no matter how seemingly trivial, contributes to the creation of our lives. This perspective can profoundly impact the way we approach our daily actions and long-term goals. Consider the concept of the ripple effect, where a single action creates waves that spread outwards, influencing various aspects of our lives and the lives of those around us. This is true for every decision we make. Whether it's choosing what to have for breakfast, deciding to call a friend, or opting for a career change, each choice sets off a series of events that shape our journey. For example, deciding to adopt a healthier lifestyle might star...

  A lot of people refuse to do things because they don’t want to go naked, don’t want to go without guarantee. But that’s what’s got to happen. You go naked until you die. Nikki Giovanni  The Paradox of Fear and Certainty: Embracing the Unknown It’s a paradox we all grapple with: the refusal to pursue our deepest desires because of the fear that we won’t succeed. We crave guarantees in a world that offers none. Whether it’s taking that leap of faith in a career change, starting a new relationship, or moving to a different city, the desire for certainty often holds us back from achieving our true potential.   Life, by its very nature, is unpredictable. We are wired to seek comfort and security, and it’s no surprise that we often wait for a “perfect” moment—a moment when success is assured. However, the reality is that guarantees are an illusion. They do not exist. The only certainty is uncertainty. This  need for assurance can be paralyzing. It keeps us in our comfort...

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  There is so much we can intentionally select in creating our reality - Danielle La Porte  Driving to Las Cuevas, a beach on the North Coast of the island, in the dark just after 5AM to catch the sunrise with the playlist jamming is another level of growth and healing for me. There was a time that I would not even dare think about driving in the dark or on the North Coast Road, now I am doing both at the same time! who knew? The twists, the turns, the cliffs on either side, the impatient drivers, the speed stars. There would be no way I would consciously, purposefully decide to wake up early to drive on that road to the beach. Looking back in this year, I was consistent in going every Saturday morning, weather permitting and once I am in the country. This is a lesson in - just do the damm thing" and learn along the way. Seeing the sun rise over the water, the fishermen get into their boats, the changes in the ocean over the year and the bonus was seeing leather back turtles c...

  Surrender takes you to places that your mind is scared of going but your soul deeply craves. Surrender begins when you fully understand that there is a life force energy that your mind cannot even comprehend, that has granted you visions, desires, and prophecies not just for FUN, but as knowing, and on the unknown . Ifakorede fafayemi Our minds, accustomed to control and predictability, often resist the idea of surrender. This resistance is rooted in fear—the fear of the unknown, the uncontrollable, and the unpredictable. We cling to the familiar, even when it no longer serves us, because it provides a semblance of security. Yet, it is precisely this clinging that confines us, preventing us from experiencing the fullness of life. While the mind may resist, the soul yearns for the freedom that comes with surrender. Deep within, we crave the experiences that challenge us, transform us, and bring us closer to our true essence. The visions, desires, and prophecies we receive are not ...

  Deeply perceiving the truth of impermanence is the key to wisdom and freedom . Yung Pueblo  In our fast-paced world, where change is often met with resistance and uncertainty breeds anxiety, the concept of impermanence can seem daunting. However, deeply perceiving the truth of impermanence is not only liberating but also a key to unlocking profound wisdom and genuine freedom. Impermanence teaches us that nothing remains static: relationships evolve, circumstances shift, and even our thoughts and emotions are fleeting. This understanding can initially evoke discomfort, as it challenges our desire for stability and permanence. We all want a guarantee from life that it will work out with less stress. The Wisdom of Impermanence To perceive the truth of impermanence deeply is to recognize that change is not an enemy, but a natural and inevitable aspect of life. This realization cultivates wisdom in several ways: Acceptance of Reality: By accepting that everything is temporary, we...

 Releasing isn't about abandoning what's meaningful but honoring its place in [or out] of my life. One of the most profound and simple lessons that I have learned thus far is that life's experiences are not personal, they are intimate. We all experience love, loss, joy, betrayal, disappointment and all the other experiences that come with this gift of life. We however have all our intimate lessons and paths to experience in life which allows us to go inside ourselves and tap into all that we are born with. The challenge is that fear, self doubt, external noises, comparing ourselves, wanting to be in control and know everything before it happens, fear of failure, shame, judgement and ego gets in the way. We forget who we are, come off our path, get distracted and lose focus. It is important to remember our divinity as we journey on. We are here, we are built and designed for life, designed for the assignment. We are inherently worthy. Remembering this, starting from that spa...

Attention is not love, Attachment is not connection, and the Bare Minimum is not effort - Mia Mingus Recognizing and accepting that you have been okay with the bare minimum is an absolutely shocking wake up call. And yet that recognition  shifts the power right back into your hands. If taken as feedback and impersonally it can be seen as an eye opener. As  I reflect on how I have been operating in relationships and still operating in some areas of my life I confess that  the  bare minimum and attachments had become the norm . As a recovering people pleaser and deathly afraid of being/feeling abandoned, I would accept what was given not to proverbially "rock the boat", to be chosen, to avoid conflict. This is unsustainable, firstly when you settle, you remove authenticity from the equation - you are not being your real self - due to fear of losing out, fear of not being chosen. Secondly, it brings about a level of resentment and envy - deep down you know you are not ...

To have more power in your life you must surrender to what you cannot change, and fully alchemize that which you can. Face the pain that is making you feel powerless, and surrender to what is out of your control. Black Moon Book  I have heard and shared about the power of surrender, the power of letting go, the power of facing and sitting in your pain many times and understood the logic and importance of living a life where this is practiced. What I have learnt over this year is the challenge of integrating this into life's experiences. When we want control, when we want to win, when we want to be right, when we operate from a space of ego, the practice of surrender and letting go is a tough nut to crack. I can fully attest to this that operating from the place of ego is a sure fire way of prolonging suffering.  Surrender and letting go is not for the weak. It requires a level of courage to face what is, to not make excuses, to not deny what is. In relationships, the choice of...

  A chaotic life ends up tossed about by fate but clear mindedness leaves room for Courage and Bold Choices. I get that now. - Carolynn Myss  There are some simple choices that I have made to make my life less chaotic and more simple both internally and externally. I have made that decision because, just as Carolyn Myss says, clarity leaves room for courage and all round better choices. When we are clear, we are able to move forward even despite the fear. When we are clear, we can think about our connection to others and how our decisions impact the relationships we find ourselves in, and more importantly to be accountable for our part. When we are clear, we make space for our intuition to guide us as opposed to our ego. When we are clear, selfishness behaviours become less and less because we know what our worth, value and responsibilities are. When we are clear, we can let go, we can surrender, knowing that did our best in the moment. When we are clear, we are no longer mak...

  All of it is precious.  The heartache is precious, too. The way that things appear to your eyes to be wrong — that, too, is precious. The hurt. The difficulty. The unfairness. The terrible losses. That longing — that deepest, hardest, heart-piercing human longing — for everything to be different than it is. All of this is precious.  The pierced heart, for sure, is precious . The things as they are, and things as you want them to be, and the things as they never can be — all precious.  The madness, precious.  What is precious, in conclusion? EVERYTHING. - Elizabeth Gilbert  I started  making a list of what was "precious" to me after reading an article by Elizabeth Gilbert. The list included; a belly laugh my breath - deep breaths upon waking up a sunrise a sunset a full moon the moment you feel love and loved and then it hit me if I did not experience the opposite of all of this then the preciousness of it all would feel different. Everything is preci...

  God speaks to us through our imagination and intuition Denis Kimbro  I have been travelling during the month of October, it's been a combination of work and play, I took the opportunity since I on another Continent altogether to spend some quality time with Self and of course, take in the sights of where I am.  I felt as if I was in a completely different world being on the road for the majority of the month, the daily responsibilities on pause gave me an opportunity to focus my time on other activities, simple things such as doing the dishes and making the bed up were no longer part of my daily routine making it easier to read, to reflect to think.  As I return home, I am convinced that time away spent wisely can rewire our brain in so many ways, can remind us what is important, can reset us to move forward. It is also important to take time off the daily routine, it does not have to be on the other side of the world, it can be a a day trip to the beach, to a par...

 The real change, the kind that brings true power and freedom, happens when we stop chasing the external gaze—the validation, the approval, or the attention of others. When you start asking yourself the deeper questions and listening to your own wisdom, you shift from relying on the outside world to knowing that the answers are inside you.This shift is where your true power lies. Dr Robin Smith Cape Town, thank you. I am leaving with heart full of gratitude, a multitude of lessons and a reminder of who I am. Confessions on the Journey - I like to be chosen, I want others to choose and validate me, and depending on who decides to not choose me, I fall apart in so many ways forgeting that there is nothing personal in this experience called life and my worth does not depend on certain people choosing me. I was reminded on this trip to hold myself accountable but do not take other people's choices personal. Life remains intimate and impersonal. Once we are in the experience of life we ...

  In life, you're given the responsibility for yourself, and the opportunity to serve everyone else. True fulfillment and success arrives when you’ve achieved a balance between these two worlds . . .Guru Singh My grandmother would say in response to the question "How are you?"  "My child I am holding on to the balance wheel and holding on to courage" I would laugh, I had no idea what she meant and to ask would start a long conversation that I usually would not want to enter into especially as a teenager. My cousins and I would make fun of it, we would change it up, make variations, sing songs about it.  As I got older I started paying attention to it. I never did ask what it meant, I made up my own meaning and have been using that as a guide I am living my life with balance and with courage no matter what comes my way. An important question to ask yourself as you journey through November when faced with a decision "is this going to support balance in my lif...

  When you have a decision to make, ask yourself does this keep me in balance or does this throw me off balance? Carolyn Myss  Cape Town continues to fascinate me with its beauty, its diversity, its history, its realness. I made a decision to do a safari. Of course I did, why would I come to Africa and have an opportunity to see animals in their natural habitat and miss it?  The bus collected me in town at 6.30 as we set out on just over a two hour ride outside of the City of Cape town to the Aquila Game Reserve. The sun was just coming up over the mountains as we headed West. The clouds, the rising sun and mountains combining together made for a postcard setting as we drove towards the reserve.  The mountains started making way for rocky cliffs that looked almost hand made, like little huts with thatched roofs made out of stone on both sides of the road with vineyards in between. There was the choice of going through a tunnel cut amongst the mountainous cliffs or u...

  Newsflash: Anger is spiritual too. Anger does two things: responds to real threats in your environment, or lets us know when a boundary has been crossed. The only time anger is unhealthy is when it is not expressed in the present . Your Spiritual Mermaid  I was scheduled to travel to Namibia on Monday morning. So excited, I was I could hardly sleep, the taxi was arranged to pick me up at the hotel at 5AM, I checked in online the night before (as you do with all that excitement) and waited to fly 2 hours to Nambia. It would be my first time in that country. The taxi collected me, I checked in, got my boarding pass and as I was about to take my laptop out to scan a representative of the airline asked me to step out of the line as I was being flagged. He asked me if I had a visa.  "A visa?" "No sir!" "You need a visa to go to Nambia madam" "Can I not get it there?" "No maam" "Step out of the line and come with me" Now I was kic...