What did I learn today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

March is drawing to a close, the Journey to Patience has been one of both revelations and frustration. Revelation due to the new  insights that I now have on what and how important patience is in any growth and healing process. Frustrating because, I confess, I love being in control and now more realizing that I have little control over things outside of myself. I also love what I want, when I want it. When I was in the corporate world , I was rewarded for persistence and finding a way. As I journey on, the lessons reveal that there is a difference between persistence and wanting to control and have things my own way. Patience is growth and healing tool. It is about seeing the grace placed in front of you as you navigate through your life. Here are my top five lessons on the Journey to Patience  1. Patience is more than waiting. Patience is a journey of trust in yourself and trust in the process. Patience reflects how much faith and inner knowing you carry. 2. Patience is abou...

  So, I hope you will allow your life to be bigger than you ever thought it could be. I hope you will wipe the mental slate clean and begin again with the truth of who you are today and all that you hope to be tomorrow - Brianna West I had a moment where the penny dropped today - what if its my mind that is holding me back? What if it is what I telling myself or not telling myself. What if its my own self talk that is holding me in this place where I am out of flow? Now, I must confess, it is difficult to admit to myself that I am standing in my own way. It, however is the starting point of a willingness to do something different and see a different perspective. What and how we been speaking to ourselves and thinking about ourselves? Our minds are so powerful, think about it, something comes up that is not even real and we give it life by a thought, it can impact the way we feel. When I believe that I am in danger, my belly starts flipping- it does not even have to be real! I only...

  When we stop trying to rid ourselves of the harder parts of being human we can begin integrating those parts. When we integrate all parts of who we are, we give ourselves the opportunity to honour the full wide, vast spectrum of what it means to be a person. When we do this we also create more access to the beautiful magical parts, too. Lisa Olivera Silent movements to enhance our consciousness and prepare  us for what we will inevitably encounter on our journey, I have learnt is different to silent movements done in fear and in shame.   Silent movements to enhance our consciousness comes with a level of peace - a peace that passes all understanding. There is no need to prove, to explain, to question, to gain validation. It simply is a knowing that this silent time, whether challenging or not, that is  supporting us in creating the life that we want to live. Sometimes we have to make silent movements for our health, our well-being, or reset. Sometimes we...

  We may not like the choices that we have, but we do get to choose . Yves Daly Ward I started meditating while I lived in Uganda. I just wanted to feel better, feel better about myself, where I was and where I was going. Confessions - it was in a moment of desperation. Previously I was not a fan of meditating, too many thoughts would come into my mind and I would not know what to do with them.  I felt uncomfortable. I would talk to myself in the middle of the process- am I doing it right?, how much longer? I feel hungry. Anything that came up in my mind I latched on, held on to and analyzed. In the end because I could not "control the process" I deemed it to be a waste of time.  I earnt that when I cannot control a process, I get scared, I do whatever it is to control it. When I cannot, I feel like a failure.  Huge lesson is- I cannot control everything and I am not a failure. I believed that I  was either meditating wrongly, or it was a waste of time. Unt...

  Be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind Romans 12.2 Breaking down the word  transform - trans is to go above, to go beyond.  Transform means there is movement, from one place/space to another.  Transform means it is no longer in the same form - the form is different. Newsflash - you cannot have transformation without change. And that transformation comes from inside, it comes from your thinking. The transformation is of your mind. The renewal comes from transforming our selves. Transformation cannot only come from the external - a new job, a new relationship, a ne practice. The transformation is you. It is YOU!  We keep chasing after people, places and things and all that other stuff thinking that when we get these certain things in our lives, we are going to be something or someone different - that is not how it works. The transformation is inside of you. Your mind, when transformed, reflects in how you live Peace Akosua's Books Nyabo (Madam) Why...

  When we are frightened, when we are in fear, what will we sell? Carolyn Myss I listened to a talk given by Carolyn Myss and let me tell you, it blew my mind right open. Carolyn, one of the teachers that I continue to learn so much from on this journey, asked, what do you give up or give in to when you are in fear? What do you sell? Do you sell your soul? Your friendships? anything?  Do you stay quiet because you are afraid of losing something? Do you speak up because you know it's what your inner voice is telling you to do? Do you stay in the job, the relationship, the friendship, the space because you are afraid of what others will say, how your bills will be paid and to not lose your status, economically, politically or otherwise? Do you walk away when you know you must? What do you do to keep the peace, to not rock the boat - because you are afraid? Simply because you are just afraid- and what does that fear look and sound like? "I just want to keep my job"; " t...

  So what is self-esteem? And what does it mean to have a healthy dose of it? Well, in short, self-esteem is the beliefs you hold about yourself. Healthy self-esteem means accepting yourself for who you are, warts and all. Stacey Hererra Sharing below a piece from Stacey Hererra that resonated with me "Self-esteem = seeing yourself as a flawed person, and still holding yourself in high regard." But most of us don't have self-esteem. We have what Terry Real describes as: Other-based-esteem : where we rely solely on other people for our sense of worth.  "I am as worthy as they think I am." or Attribute-based-esteem : where we focus on the tangible parts of ourselves, such as our appearance or accomplishments.  "I am worthy because of what I have." or Performance-based-esteem : where we rely on the things we do or achieve to determine our value and worth.  "I am as worthy as what I can do." But none of these are accurate. Healthy self-esteem com...

  Choosing to show up as who we are might mean facing the projections others hold and no longer shapeshifting ourselves to avoid them. It might mean letting go of the comfort we might find in performing the roles we assume we must stay in to belong. It might mean facing the uncertainty of outcome, the potential for rejection or failure, the disapproval and disappointment. Yet what comes as a side effect of showing up as who we are has felt much bigger than all of that . Lisa Olivera  Showing up...real has been a journey that I have embarked upon since my life changed a few years ago. The person I was then, or the person I believed I was then has changed. I felt a strong desire for people to see that and, in hindsight, fought so much both internally and externally for that. Sometimes in the fighting I lost focus on me, wanting to show and prove to others that I am no longer the person you believed I was. Back then, I wanted approval,  I wanted to be liked, I wanted to hav...

 Even if you are enlightened, there is nothing spiritual about opening every aspect of your life to everyone just because he or she is an innocent child of God. The Holy Spirit gives you that discernment. Keep your heart open and discern. Sometimes the lesson is to discern. We meet certain people to teach us discernment  Marianne Willamson   1. Do not bargain your self worth - you bargain your self worth when you are willing to accept a  situation which dishonors  you ,consistently, to keep the peace and to avoid arguments,  -stay in your comfort zone, feeling ashamed and accept bad behavior and nonsense because of fear of losing. 2. Change your thoughts- first you must pay attention to the thoughts that are in your head. Many times we become unconscious negative and self defeating thoughts we hold on to. I ask myself often "what are you thinking?" and when I find myself in a spiral, rather than beat up myself again, I say "Oh how interesting, let me think ...

  Where you are standing is sacred. We all have our part to play on the sacred ground upon which we now stand. Iyanla Vanzant  Where you are now standing is sacred ground. Where you are, right now, in this moment, is not by chance. It is not by coincidence, it is by design. I truly believe so. I truly believe that wherever we are in the present moment it is by divine design. There is always a lesson, a reason, a purpose, a blessing. Always  What is Sacred Ground? Sacred ground is where you can make a positive contribution to wherever you are placed, wherever you are Sacred ground is where you can make a difference Sacred ground is where you can do your best in the moment Sacred ground is where you can be authentic and true Sacred ground is where you decide to take care of yourself, to rest. Sacred ground is where you can demonstrate to yourself that you are worthy Sacred ground is knowing that not only are you good enough, you are more than enough. Sacred ground is where...

  I had to stop fighting. I had to stop resisting. I had to surrender all my ideas of how my life was supposed to be so I could have the life I was meant to have. Every loss was a way of traveling lighter, eliminating what wouldn’t serve me on my journey. This hard-won understanding was both enlightening and painful. Alicia Rodriguez No, literally, I was lost in the real woods this weekend. On a Sunday, I would wake up early and take a walk on some of the beautiful trails about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I look forward at the start of a new week, to taking those walks, the peacefulness of it all, the discovery, sometimes I would unexpectedly meet rivers, streams, waterfalls, monkeys, birds, sometimes people. Nature has always been a regenerator, a healing of sorts for me. Its simplicity reminds me that there is a level of magnificence and grace in life when we pay attention. I have been going alone for a very long time, I would invite someone ever so often. On this Sunday...

  Change requires courage, it requires consistency, it requires deep devotion. And this deep devotion to create lasting change lacks in people who are not truly ‘done with it’, who are not aware of the suffering it creates for them, how severely it limits them, and still find ways to escape from it, to numb themselves. Lori Krenn What are you "Done With?" Let me tell you, declaring that you are DONE with something with conviction and belief to the Universe works wonders. That declaration says, I am willing, I am ready, I am convicted in a firm belief to move, shift, change, rearrange this thing that I am declaring boldly that I am done with. I am DONE WITH procrastinating I am DONE WITH perfectionism I am DONE  WITH people pleasing I am DONE WITH putting myself last  I am DONE WITH playing small I am DONE WITH over explaining I am DONE WITH not prioritizing my health I am DONE WITH not speaking up I am DONE WITH dishonoring my own boundaries I am DONE WITH over...

  Tell me how much you want it. Tell me how much you want it and how much more you want it than afraid of it   Iyanla Vanzant What does patience mean to you? Growing up, I remember my mother telling me multiple times that I was too impatient, I wanted want I wanted and I wanted it now! I did not understand what she meant, why was there a problem in getting and having what I want...and right away. When I did not get what I want and in quick time, I would throw a tantrum, which most times got me in a heap of trouble. When I realized  that the tantrum was not working, I started "searching" for solutions to get what I want when I want. Many times, that yielded results and other times huge disappointments. What I did learn from searching for solutions was that  there is a balance, a connection in searching for a solution and getting what we want when we want. The connection is to faith, trust, surrender and acceptance. On this Journey to patience, let me remember tha...