What did I learn today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

“ Whenever you feel uncomfortable, instead of retreating back into your old comfort zone, pat yourself on the back and say, “I must be growing,” and continue moving forward.”  – T. Harv Eker Another comfort zone smashed again.  I received a call late on Saturday evening to appear on a very popular morning radio programme. I was apprehensive as I do not consider myself an expert on the topic of "Girls Sex Ed in Schools" the producer told me to share my views. So, I listened to the lessons that I have learnt on the journey to "show up as myself"  At first I was a bit slow, I lost my train of thought, I thought that the ground would open up and swallow me, I paused, relaxed and got into it after! I did not let the slip deter me from not only showing up, but also having fun! And I did have fun. Peace

When Was The Last Time You Did Something For the First Time? Anonymous Today I participated in an event called "Ole Mas" it is a historical event held in Trinidad and Tobago where people dress up in costumes and give social commentary on issies affecting the world and the country in a comical fashion. I have never done it before, it always looked like it took courage and balls really! So when a friend asked me to participate, I was giving tons of excuses about why and why not and maybe or maybe not Then when I sat and gave it further thought, I said to myself Self, don't you want to be more courageus? - Yes Don't you want to smash comfort zones? - Yes Don't you want to meet new people? - Yes Don't you want to see what is on the other side of fear? - Yes After that conversation with self I decided to say yes What absolute fun I had! It was a blast and I was able to support my friend in her endeavour We even won a trophy, a bottle of wine and a ...

Wanting is universal. We all have something we want. Sometimes those wants are huge and overwhelming. Sometimes, those wants are simple and humbling. Regardless of what it is that we want, too much wanting can strangle the beauty in just being, in presence. Wanting can be a finely danced balance. But if you do a few things right, you'll experience more of what it is that you want without being poisoned by the wanting . Maxie McCoy Have you ever wanted anything so much that it hurt? Have you ever wanted something so much that you felt that you would lose your mind? Have you ever wanted a thing so badly that you deserted all manner of common sense? Yes, my friends, the Universal wanting! What do you do when the Universal wanting takes over? My top 5 tips 1. Know your Why- Why is the want so pressing 2. Patience. Patience. Patience. 4. Trust is essential 5. Take responsibility 6. Do the Work Peace

Desperation is unstainable - Cheryl Strayed Yesterday I felt desperate, I really did. All day meetings with the publishers did not yield the results that I believed would aid in the success of my trip! Desperation had me acting like a nutter! It was almost like a total out of body experience. Desperation adds to reactionary behaviour It promotes doubt and uncertainty Making a decision out of desperation can be a recipe for disaster. After I had my out of body experience I realised that, because of my desperation I made choices out of fear and said a few things that I cannot take back! Alll that I can do is apologize! Lesson- feel the feelings, take some time before reacting and most of all trust that once you have put in the work that whatever happens it's all good! Peace

No man is an island entire of itself: every man is a part of the continent, a part of the main - John Donne More time spent with the fam fam yesterday, my cousin and I stepped into the boing ring. I love boxing, I started boxing a few years ago, it promoted my stress belief and anger management on the journey. My cousin loves boxing as well, we have had many long conversations on it so getting a time to step into the ring last night was a happy moment for me. We had loads of un. It is interesting how me living my own life impacted others. Over the past two days this has been pointed out to me in ways that have humbled me and brought me back on track. What I am saying today is, living your life, your best life, your most authentic life, is a demonstration of what is possible. What is possible when you take one day at a time, when you are authentic, when you make decisions out of love rather than fear, when you show up, when you live your own life, mind your own business and love ...

The major work of the world is not done by geniuses. It is done by ordinary people, with balance in their lives, who have learned to work in an extraordinary manner.”  ―  Gordon B. Hinckley I always take the opportunity to come to Houston mainly because I have very close family living here. I take the time to see them, spend time with them, catching up. It is almost like a home away from home. Over the weekend I did just that, I have 6 cousins and an aunt who live here. I grew up with them, they know me, we can laugh, make jokes, hang and shoot the breeze Until I sat down around the kitchen table having fun with them I did not realise that I don't do this much, I spend quite a bit of time alone, which yes is required. As with everything, balance is essential. So the lesson I took from it is to get the balance, how can I create more balance between quiet time and interacting with my loved ones, outside of work. So many times we fall into a routine and forget about wha...

When I think of all those disappointments I just laugh - Aretha Franklyn I was scheduled to fly to Houston on Friday, I was also scheduled to attend an event at the University before flying out. I decided to get home early to pack. Picked up my passport case and to my shock and utter horror the passport was not where it was supposed to be. I started looking for it, turned into a four hour smash down, I could not make the University function and it sure looked like I may not be making the flight as well. I started feeling ill, just ill at the inconveniece of having to get new documents. The search continued, 3 hours left to make the flight. I decided to take one last look. I emptied the book case and looked through each book, on the last shelf there it was tucked neatly into a book staring at me. The movements started I was rushing now to make the flight. One hour left. I asked a friend to pick me up, she was running behind and then she called, she got a flat tire Have you ever h...

Fear is not of the unknown, but of the loss of the known. The unknown does not incite fear, but dependence on the known does. Fear is always with desire, the desire for the more or for the less. The mind, with its incessant weaving of patterns, is the maker of time; and with time there is fear, hope and death. J. Krishnamurti, The Book of Life As humans, we love the familiar, we love to "know" , we love to be in control. We love it so much that we are willing to go through pain and suffering to be in control and to know, we are willing to lose friends and loved ones to prove that we are right, we are willing to argue our point to the last without thinking of the consequences of these actions. Fear of the loss of what we know drives us to make decisions that keep us stuck. One of the questions I ask myself over and over again is "what would you do right now, in this moment if you were not afraid?" and then I do it. Sometimes I am happy about the decision an...

I’m ferocious about it, in the best way. What do I want to do with my one, precious life? What’s important to me? Why will it matter to me? How do I want to feel? What do I have control over—how can I do more of that? Kate Courageous  The Course in Miacles says ,enlightment is a shift in perception. If you choose to see the material world as your reality then that will be your reality. You will live on that plane. Whatever you choose to believe as your reality will manifest in your life, that is the power that you possess. You co-create with the Universe, and you lead it by your thoughts and belifs, not only your actions. They all must line up! The Course in Miracles  believes that shifting your perception can lead to shifting your life's experience. I believe it as well and have lived to experience it.  Moment after moment, the shift my perception, the questioning of core beliefs, the self belief, the self love made my experience of this precious life change. It ...

So I invite you to...  forgive yourself    make the call   tell the truth   book the flight   do the scary thing   say I love you like you mean it If you knew how much time you had left, how would you want to spend it? Figure out a way to do that now . The best way to live is like you're dying because you are.  Stacey Herrera What are you waiting on to do that thing you know you absolutely must do? No, really, what is the delay really about? What's the excuse, rationale, reason? My question to you today! Peace

Don't feel no pity for me Cause I'm going through a couple things, Life means change, That's the way it goes, goes All my life I had a constant burning A strong deep, desire An aching ambiguous, yearning, yearning, yearning For something better For something bigger For something wider For something higher Jill Scott Someone said to me thins morning " I have this feeling that I should be doing something else, something bigger I just don't know what it is, I have sat many a time trying to figure it out" I thought about my own journey for a while and I was actually doing the same thing. I felt that I had to do something else, be somewhere else, with someone else, where I was could not be IT! Or could it? What I learnt was, until you make a decision, a choice to move, where you are is where it is! Until you have made peace with where you are, until you are accepting and grateful then its always a struggle After the acceptance and the gratitude c...

I'm my destiny, must invest in me Or I'm just gonna be victim of circumstance All is left to chance, how can I enhance? I'm afraid to dance I must break this trance, 'cause it? its deafening So I'm breathing in, I'm breathing in, I'm breathing in Breath to get control of me I have to be If I stay right here I?ll die inside Floetry One of my favourite lessons is "You and God are a majority" that's all it takes to start, start it and see what happens. The responsibility for my own life depends on me, and with God/Universe as the guide, it's all good in the hood! The responsibility for investing in myself depends on me, and with God/The Universe as the guide, it's all good in the hood Waiting on something and someone to change is a sure fire way to become a victim - they cannot read your mind So think about the time when you complain about "those" people who are messing up your flow, or "those" peop...

Let all things be as they are - ACIM Grasping, grasping, grasping.... When we have a goal, a dream, a vision, there may be times that we doubt ourselves, especially when it seems on the outside that things are not falling into place as we see it, as we want it. We start questioning what we are doing wrong, what we aren't doing to get us there quicker, we may even contemplate if we are on the right track. I have learnt when we get to that point we attract more of the same, we see all the wrongs, and start attracting everything to prove our point of doubting, we start grasping, blaming, trying to control, losing focus. The Universe starts letting you know that you need to regroup, recalibrate, refocus. And we must may attention. That is really all that is happening. The dream you have is really smaller than the one the Universe has for you, do not limit yourself. Keep an open mind. Part of the journey is self belief and trust, letting go, paying attention, taking responsibil...

you can do ­anything for a little while if it’s ­going to make you better. You can do anything for a little while if it’s going to help you grow. Understand the blessing is on the other side.   Iyanla How do we separate the feedback from the noise? How do we know what is information that we ought to take into consideration as compared to what is other people's "stuff"? I have been asking myself this question for the past couple of days. This morning I got very still again and asked the question. This is what I have come up with thus far: When you hear feedback that you know can be used to improve, transform, change your way of being, you feel it, you resonate with it, you may even get pissed off but you receive it, even if it comes from a medium that you are not comfortable or happy with. Other people's stuff, you know deep down that it does not resonate with you, it is more cutting and cruel, in your heart you know, this is not about me, not the postul...

Knowledge without follow-through is worse than no knowledge.” - Charles Bukowski Every action has a consequence returning to you. For every cause there is an effect. For every effect can be traced back to a cause. If you react to circumstances you may be unconscious in your reactions. If you respond to circumstances you may be conscious and deliberate in your responses. If you act consciously aware of the choices that you make, in every present moment of now, you can decide if that choice will bring happiness to you as well as for those around you affected by your choice. By becoming a conscious maker of choices, the effect of your actions is to enable evolvement for you and for those around you affected by your choice. Ultimately, this evolution will be happiness for you and those affected by the cause and effect set into motion, by your conscious choice you made standing in your integrity.

If we choose to be in denial, and we choose not to admit we have a problem, a dis-ease, a illness, an addiction then we will never be able to heal it.  We must be honest with ourselves and face whatever we have created for ourselves and do our best to transmute it, transform it and heal it on all levels of our beings and this will require conscious action and determination. Thoughts are powerful, but we can not just "think" our problems away by ignoring them. We can't just eat a dozen doughnuts and "think" the sugar, fat, calories and chemicals away. There are consequences for every action so if we want to change, we must first get to the root of the cause and make necessary changes, through our actions, so we don't remain in the complacency of our self created insanity . S abrina Reber Sometimes we meet people who are messengers. When we detach from the messenger it is easier to receive the message. When the message is delivered the person may at mo...

Some of us are so full of fear we create chaos and confusion, not only for ourselves, but also with the very people we think we are being loving to. Love and Fear can never be experienced together, they are polar opposites. When we are in fear we are expressing the darkness and limitations of our ego and shadow consciousness. Raise Your Vibration A Course in Miracles says that there are only two emotions, Love and Fear. Anything that is not love is fear. Love promotes peace, harmony, balance, authenticity, abundance, forgiveness, fun, growth, sharing, discipline, intuitive thinking and action and courage. Fear promotes the opposite. Decisions made out of fear promote short term results and anxiety. Love is simple, it is an energy it cannot be destroyed The best way to combat fear is to show love and show up in love. Peace Read Akosua's Books What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?

Personal change cannot be accomplished by technology. It requires commitment, persistence, determination and PATIENCE! Iyanla I met her when she was 15 years old, she was working at the hair salon that I would visit. She would be sweeping or doing any errands that was required. On one visit I had the opportunity to chat with her. She told me that she was determined to be a haridresser, it was her dream, nothing would stop her not even the area where she was from. She lived in one of the notorious "hoods" in the capital city where most of the society write people off who live there. As I continued to visit the salon she started doing more than sweeping and errands, she would wash the client's hair, we would always have our conversations about life.She always was so determined and disclipined, I could not help but admire her tenacity. After a few months, she started managing the salon. The owner decided to give her an opportunity to manage the salon. Seemed ...

" If you are to free yourselves you must break the chains of oppression yourselves. Only then can we express our dignity, only when we have liberated ourselves can we co-operate with other groups. Any acceptance of humiliation, indignity or insult is acceptance of inferiority." Winnie Mandela When I turned 13 ,my granma gave me a book called “Part of My Soul Went With Him” by Winnie Mandela.  Confessions on the Journey, I had no idea who she was! My granma told me to read it as she thought I could do with some “toughening up”. I read it. I read it again. I read it once more. I marvelled at this woman’s courage and resilience and was I outraged by the system called apartheid. The book planted a seed.  I did not know if it toughened me up then but it certainly peaked my interest in Women’s Rights and in this far away land called South Africa. When I got the opportunity to go to South Africa for the first time I jumped at it. I learned more about how women were the backbon...

“It doesn't matter how much you know. It matters what you're willing to step into. It matters what you're willing to do. It matters how much transformation you desire. It matters what your vision is. It matters what decisions you make. It matters what standards you set for your life. It matters how much you get back up. It matters how you treat yourself. It matters how much you put to use. It matters how you treat other people. It matters what stories you tell yourself. It matters what fears you'll step into. It matters how you show up.” - Alexandra Covucci  To "know" is only part of the puzzle. Let's call it the puzzle of living our best life. Your good intentions are another part of the puzzle. Each on their own may not take you to that next level, to where you want to go, to  you living your best life . You may ask what does living your best life mean, what does it look like? It looks like a life on purpose, of  healthy relationships,...

The truth of the matter is, when we are afraid, we act in fear. When we are angry, we react to the things that anger us. When we are lazy, we simply don't try. When we are self-sabotaging, self-defeating or self-defiant, we blame other people for our lack of progress. We conveniently forget our habitual reactive behaviors that leave things unsaid, tasks incomplete, dreams unfulfilled, goals unmet and people hanging on. Until Today Random conversation with a long time friend last night. In chatting the talk  moved to our ex husbands, they were both best friends as well. Many a double date happened when we were courting! She told me that the new house my ex just built is a mansion, so modern and spacious and went on to explain its merits.  After she said it I immediately responded that I am happy for him, that it was funny though because he expressed to me that he never wanted to live in that area.  When the conversation ended I realised that I was feeling bummy!...