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Showing posts from August, 2020

Niceness Every Time?

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  Too often, there is this belief that when healing comes we will be rewarded. We will get the spouse that we have been searching for, the job we desperately want, it will fix our relationships + friendships or we will receive some kind of blessing.  The reality is, the only guaranteed reward you will see as a result of your healing and growth is the assurance that you are worthy and always will be. There is sometimes a bit of anxiousness in how I approach situations, particularly when I fall back into old habits and beliefs that being nice is something to strive for and maintain. Being nice, I felt, would have absolved me from any hurt or drama. Being nice, I have learnt, became a trap for me sometimes accepting less than, proving that I would not rock the boat, and a whole other host of actions, behaviors and rationale for why I accepted less and ignored my feelings. I was under the impression that, Nice people don't get angry in public, nice people are not fussy, nice ...

Judge Not

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  Maybe everyone is doing their best, to their ability, at their current level of awareness? Were you not ignorant at some point in your life? Takes time to realise presence/egolessness. No need to judge, argue, get angry or hate... only shine the light . Joyful Awareness When I was living out in Uganda, working with a group of phenomenal women who had a clear vision of rebuilding their community and becoming independent and self sufficient One particular week I was left to “keep an eye on the place” while the management team made a work related trip up North. Seemed easy enough, everyone knew their roles and responsibilities. Day one, smooth as ice cream, we were all happy, things were running well! Day two, smooth as ice cream, as well! Day 3, “Madam Akosua, they have refused to work” What? What do you mean refuse to work? They have refused. I step outside and all the employees were sitting down with their arms folded! Oh oh it looks like a strike! “What’s going on?” " They hav...

Do You Love What You Feel?

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 Do you love what you feel? Chaka Khan What do you do for self-care?  For Joy? For Relaxation For Fun? Do you love what you feel? What do you do to laugh? to Unwind? to Just Shoot the Breeze? Do you love what you feel? Life is about balance Do something nice for yourself today and Love how it feels! Peace Have you read any of Akosua's work? What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here? Daily Lessons on the Journey - A Journal Follow Akosua on Twitter Instagram Facebook

Inner Peace requires Inner Work

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  I used to think my good deeds would heal me, if I got the better job, was kinder, more generous and succeeded that all my pain would fade away. I learned healing doesn't work that way Minna B How many of us are obsessed with being nice, with being successful, with being hard working whilst living from a space of inner chaos or a space of achieving because we believe that it would bring a level of inner peace or fulfillment? Let me tell you, there is nothing that is only external that would bring you a level of inner peace.  Inner peace takes the decision and commitment to become self aware and to focus on inner self rather than our achievements, accomplishments, our "nice personality" and our external trappings. It is not always pretty to face some of our own BS or our own poor choices but by now you know, there is always a lesson and all the dots usually add up. The starting point of inner peace is the decision to become peaceful. Everything starts with a firm decision...

I Have a Right to...

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  Worry about yourself for the next few weeks, you deserve it . Ehimehora I have a right.... I have a right to peace I have a right to love I have a right to feel all my feelings I have a right to say No I have a right to say Yes I have a right to follow my dreams I have a right to change my mind I have to right to the boundaries that I set I have a right to rest I have a right to speak up I have a right to choose I have a right to change I have a right to be joyful I have a right to not like other people I have a right to abundance I have a right to state my case Share with me what you have a right to I look forward to it Peace Join me at the Worldwide Women in Innovation Incubation and Innvation Summit on 28th August 2020 W-WIITS Summit

Boundaries can be a consistent light

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  “Your boundary need not be an angry electric fence that shocks those who touch it.. It can be a consistent light around you that announces: “I will be treated sacredly.” - Jaiya John This weekend I listened to a talk about having and setting boundaries. It resonated with me because I have noticed lately that I have been putting myself last due to fear of losing people and losing period. I believe that setting boundaries is difficult for me, in chatting with others I have now discovered that many other people have challenges as well in setting boundaries for one or more of the following reasons: 1. Fear of pushing others away - how would others react or respond to us setting boundaries. 2. Fear of others not liking us - people pleasers are afraid to say no, they are afraid to make others mad, sad or disappointed. 3. Not knowing how to say NO - tied in to people pleasing and fear of losing. If there are people in our lives who are mad if you set boundaries, these are not your peop...

Building the Foundation of Self Value

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  1.      If you knew, believed and was absolutely certain that when you showed up – anywhere- for anything, any activity, any event that you ARE everything and you HAVE everything, what would your actions look like? How would you show up? The Self is who you are at the core of your being. The Self is who you are minus all of the external trappings.   The Self represents your Divinity, which you were born with, it’s inside of you and will always be there. You were born Divine, this is unshakeable   Some of us place our value on our ego and our personality, some of us place our value on what we have and what we don’t have. Some of us place our value on who others say we are.   The challenge in placing our value on the ego and the personality on what we have and what we don’t have is, when life’s challenges come, and trust me they will come, we start questioning our worth, we start bargaining with others for our worth, competing and questioning, seeking ...

No Labels

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  Don’t put yourself in a box that the Divine didn’t put you in . Black Soul Theory I was having a conversation with a very dear friend of mine today, I told her that I felt like a fraud because I made what I thought was a very important decision based on fear. My friend asked me why I made that statement and felt that way. My response was " I usually suggest to others those close to me and those who have encountered me during speaking and writing to make decisions from a place of love, rather than fear" Here I am doing the opposite of what I not only learn but teach. My friend reminded me to go easy on myself and that we teach what we need to learn. There are times when we are harder on ourselves than we would be on others, I think it is because when we lose faith and trust in ourselves we know that it will trickle out into our daily living. It would become increasingly difficult to trust. Both self and others. That conversation was a great reminder: 1. to go easy on ourselv...

How Are You? Really?

  If you are a person who resists change, these COVID times have probably been difficult for you. If you are a person who needs to control things in your environment, likely, you too find these times challenging. Whatever the case may be for you, inside of your discomfort, disquiet, irritation, and restlessness there is information waiting to be to be seen and acknowledged.   Tina Lifford Yesterday someone asked me "How are you? and please don't give me your standard I am good response" I thought about it for a moment. I asked her about what she  said to me. She said, I usually give a few standard replies to that question so she never really knows how I really am really feeling or doing. When I thought about my responses, I realized that it a combination of holding back on negativity and wanting to make affirmations of positivity.  Words have power, my words are prayers I truly believe that, so I am mindful of what I say and how I say it. Sometimes I slip u...

Simple Reminders of Growth

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  to whom this may concern; sometimes, searching for old feelings in old places won't make you feel like your old self again. sometimes, accepting that you’ve shed old skin and that you’re deserving of a better version than your older self is what will make you feel like you again . Billy Chapata It is always a lesson and a reminder to me when I bump into someone from my past. People who either knew me before now and dropped out of my life, or those who I met along the way and meet ever so often. The lessons and reminders are sometimes funny and other times I would say brutal because I recognise when I feel triggered. Reminders to me that I either have grown or still have some growing to do. Lessons in patience, kindness, and boundaries and most importantly how to not put and keep others in a box, or in the space where I first met them. Just like me, people change and evolve all the time. It also reminds me to keep moving forward with self compassion and kindness to self, as that ...

Build Up Your Internal Peace

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  Project your internal peace outward rather than absorbing external chaos inward. A Journey Within So many happenings in this here 2020! On a daily basis, there are situations and events that pop up which conjures up so many different types of feelings, from uncertainty all the way to fear. It is so easy to get sucked in to all of the negativity. Easy to be bogged down by the uncertainty. The brilliant thing about acknowledging our feelings is that it can guide us, when we feel we can deal then heal. There is no healing without feeling The other brilliant part is in these times we get to practice how to go within and tap into the peace that we all have. If we cannot find it, we only have to spend some time remembering and re cultivating it. Put some work into building and re-building your internal peace. Some of the work includes meditation, stillness, spending time with your thoughts, walking in nature, yoga, gardening, less social media especially upon wakening in the morning. ...

I am Letting Go of...

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  1 QUESTION FOR YOU:  What am I holding on to that I need to let go of? James Clear I am letting go of fear of failure. I am letting go of fear of uncertainty. I am letting go of not asking for what I want. I am letting go of clutter.  I am letting go of playing small. I am letting go of overdoing the chocolate eating. I am letting go of wanting to control others. I am letting go of giving unsolicited advice. I am letting go of ignoring my feelings. I am letting go of beliefs that no longer serve me. I am letting go of taking on false responsibilities Over to you.... Share with me some of what you are letting go of Peace Sign up to be Empowered! Join me and 50 other guides at the Empower Summit August 22nd 2020 https://summit.guidely.com/?msID=e8ded574-2ab9-475e-a5af-0f079db5dfec#

When it's time to Move..

Sometimes reconnecting is to remind you of who you were It’s the Universe asking “This you?” Shaking you from the complacency of being good enough Let blasts from the past remind you why you changed directions The discipline of your new path isn’t restrictive It’s protection Soul Shifter When it is time for you to move, to shift, to change, to pivot, to reconnect, to recharge, to change your behaviour, to change your job, to pay attention to your relationships and choices, Life will send you signs. Life loves us so much, she will gently introduce you to situations which nudge you to pay attention. Calmly at first.'A little louder when ignored. When it reaches a full blown crisis in our lives I can safely say that we have been completely ignored and denied the signs given to us by life. What I have learned is that: 1. Life loves us.Life loves us to much it gives us the nudges we need. 2. Denial, busyness, justification and rationales will not stop the nudges, it must be faced 3. Eve...

Love Yourself Through it All

Remember that t he answer to whatever you're waiting for won't fix you, make you, or change you . As happy as you are right now in the waiting, is relatively similar to the levels of joy you'll feel once the waiting is through. Sit with that for a minute. Maxi McCoy My lovies, it's been a while. Confessions on the Journey. What a week! It seems that this week's intention was for me to use or recall every single lesson on the Journey. This week there was a break in where I live and that alone brought it's own feelings, following on from that the perpetrators cleaned out my bank account and Friday was my last day at one of the places I work, then to add on the list, my aunt died while giving birth.. All at once I had to face myself and face the feelings associated with all of these events. After getting over the initial shock, I knew I had to feel all of the feelings, I had to process my own life which was giving me stories and signs, I had to take stock.  What I...

Journey to Letting Go

“ We can't be afraid of change. You may feel very secure in the pond that you are in, but if you never venture out of it, you will never know that there is such a thing as an ocean, a sea. Holding onto something that is good for you now, may be the very reason why you don't have something better.” C Joy Bell Dear August We welcome each other on the Journey to Letting Go of: -        Limited beliefs that no longer serve me -        People pleasing -        Shame& Guilt for resting & self care & having fun -        Blaming others & not taking responsibility for our actions & choices -        Outdated status quo ways -        Self doubt -        Judging others, Judging self -        Ungratefulness -   ...