What did I learn today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

" Grace is always a gift. It cannot be summoned, seduced, cajoled or earned; only embraced, only received. We can be allies and agents of grace in the simplest of ways. By the quality of care and attention we bring to our everyday encounters. By nurturing our own bodies and hearts, tending to those in our sphere, extending welcome and hospitality to the human and non-human world alike. Touching everything our hands encounter with love, with respect, with appreciation. Building, in ourselves, in our homes and in our businesses, the qualities of the world in which we want to live. Grace lives in the heart of our humanity. We don’t need to zoom out to the rim of the cosmos to find it – it’s right here, in you, in me, in the way we live our everyday lives. Grace lives in choosing to love every part of you, especially the parts of which you are embarrassed or ashamed; the parts you have banished to the underlands of your life. Grace lives in the act of pouring the honey of mercy into t...

  Every new beginning you've experienced has led you to the person you are today . Rachel Astor New beginnings can be exciting, particularly when it is a personal choice to  start over, to begin again.  New beginnings provide an opportunity to make a fresh start, forge a new path. How do you perceive new beginnings? Life is impersonal. When the end of a relationship, job, situation or whatever it is has been reached, life will simply give us cues. We may feel a certain heaviness, our feelings become less joyful, our intuition tells us to take the next best new path. Many times when we ignore life's cues and force to remain where we are, this is the genesis of suffering. New beginnings does not mean giving up, it may mean surrendering to the notion that there is something different out there for you to do.  New beginnings can build character, it allows us to see how much progress we have made and how much progress we still have to make, Change is happening all ar...

  Self-acceptance has been the greatest gift I have ever given myself. In it, I have found peace amongst the chaos within me. Because of it, I can permit others to be more of themselves too . Stacy Herrera I am naturally open to listen, but insanely private. I crave intimate moments, but I find intimate acts can sometimes be intimidating.  Sometimes I avoid eye contact because I want to remain invisible as much as I want to be seen.  An then... Anonymity, I have learnt, triggers me.  Connection and solitude is high on my list of priorities . Reading is one my favorite things to do , mainly because that is the only activity that allows me to do both simultaneously.  Some days I wake up with my heart overflowing with gratitude and excitement. And other days, I struggle to wake up because I feel anxious and imposter syndrome takes over. I am inspired by people with lots of  genuine friends, I feel also that it may include some serious work. A few friends will ...

  Opening ourselves to willingness may feel like we are surrendering or abandoning all that we believed. But at the same time it is an act of power and courage because it is a conscious choice we make about how to apply our personal will. Being willing is to be in a state of willing something into creation. It is at once allowing ourselves to be while also choosing to direct our energy in a focused way. It is being and doing from a place of openness, where we can work with the universe rather than resist it. It is an open hand rather than one that is clenched into a fist. When we make a step toward willingness, we open ourselves to truth, possibility, and the movement of the wise universe in and through our lives . Daily OM One of the greatest lessons I have learnt on the Journey thus far is "be willing" At the onset of being told to be willing...again, I resisted it. I could not wrap my head around why people were going on about how important it was for me to be "willin...

  Funny how simple it is to settle into discontentment. So much so that there is a sense of security in sorrow and frustration. You unwittingly become Stockholm to dysfunction. It’s not what you like; it’s what you know .  Stacey Herrera As we approach the end of this cycle called a year, self reflection of the lessons learnt become a priority for me. Allow me to share the top 21 lessons that I learnt. Please drop a comment to share yours. This too shall pass. We are all connected, despite where we live, what we believe. Always show up in love, rather than in fear, it makes a difference. Have boundaries - use them! No. Sometimes it is all you must say in response. Yes. Sometimes Yes is all it takes. Everyone is going through their own internal battles. Some people need to be loved from afar. There are times you need to and must mind your own business You cannot save others, nor can you do their work for them. You do not need to share your opinion on every single thing. Feeling...

  Your healing will change the world around you . Valencia Your healing is your responsibility. It may sound harsh, hear me out though. Your ability to respond to situations that are in your life, some perhaps out of your control, is with you. How do you respond to situations, challenges and difficult situations says where you are in both your growing and healing. Life is very consistent in reflecting back to us where we are, where we must grow, heal, forgive, move, change, shift, love, forgive, get courage. It is up to us to pay attention to the signs. What happens when we don't? life will keep showing us over and over again. The moment we look to blame or give up our power to the external, we find ourselves right back in the cycle. Pay attention to your life, to the signs and signals that life continues to give you. Pay attention to your responses. are you blaming, externalizing, looking for scapegoats, rationales, justification and excuses. Pay attention if you are not or never ...

  Hard pill to swallow : a lot of us practice emotional avoidance & call it a positive mindset . Marcos Alvarado Feel all of your feelings, do not be afraid of them, they are guides, they are here to reflect to you where you are in life. Feel them, deal with them, then you heal. Avoiding your feelings manifests itself in not just poor health, in poor relationships - all relationships. December is a month to focus on feeling, dealing and healing. Peace Akosua

  The universe is our mirror and until our patterns and issues get healed we will continue to run into ourselves everywhere we go. We attract relationships with certain individuals so they can show us areas in our own life that need to be healed through their actions and behaviors - Sabrina Reber Look around you, look at your life, look at your friends, look at it all.  What do you see?  Life is designed in such a way that it mirrors back to us how we live, and what we have recreated. Yes it sounds strange, simple and some may say weird. Bear with me though.  I am slowly learning about what I would call the Mirror concept. The Mirror is a reflection of what is. When we recognize and accept what is, we can move forward from a place of knowing. What is real, what is true, what needs to be looked at more closely, what needs to be cleaned up. The mirror is a powerful tool. It provides you with the opportunity to take full responsibility for what is reflected b...

  a sacred connection is on the other side of shame. weed out your garden, tend to your wounds— honor yourself - Malanda  The moment you find yourself externalizing, blaming others for what is happening in your life and not holding yourself accountable, you give away your power. Human beings love being right and being in control. I can relate - I mean, who wants to look dumb? so when we are not in tuned with taking personal responsibility and accountability we blame others, when we forget who we are, we blame others, when we are in fear we blame others. Seems an easy fix then right? Taking responsibility and accountability means tending to your wounds, it means remembering who we are, it involves acting from a place of love rather than fear. The challenge with tending to your wounds is that it takes a tremendous amount of courage, surrender and stillness. Many of us are simply not ready or willing to do surrender. The result of this being the continuation of the cycle of ...

Journey in Grace - Lalah Delia I have learnt that people we disagree  with or people who "trip us off" are our biggest teachers. What do they teach you? 1. Patience 2. Empathy 3. To leave ego out of the equation 4. The power of a pause 5. The consequences of one's actions 6. How much more growing is required 7. How much growth has taken place 8. How self aware you are 9. What habits require changing. 10. To love yourself through it all - Most importantly! Peace

  Feelings are beautiful information. Every feeling—when observed through the heart—helps us become more conscious (it’s the heart that expands consciousness, not the other way around). Feelings are a global positioning system for the soul. Danielle La Porte One of my favorite songs is by Chaka Khan and its called "Do You Love What You Feel?"  When I hear the song, I think about the lessons I learnt about how I can use my feelings as a guide, a compass of sorts rather than ignore them or constantly live in them. Feelings provide us with valuable information - as Danielle says beautiful information. That information serves us very well when we can accept that there is some value in it. For a very long time I dismissed, ignored and denied my feelings. If I was happy I thought, hmm this may be too good to be true, so let me save some. If I was annoyed, upset, angry I would convince myself that those feelings were destructive and would not serve me well So there I was stuck i...

  After you truly surrender, everything you could ever want just seems to show up . Wayne Dyer Have you ever found yourself looking for an item you lost? You retrace your steps, you clean the entire house - or turn it upside down, with the aim to finding it. You sit, you ponder, you sweat all with the aim of finding this item and nothing! And just as you decide to stop because you have accepted that it is gone, it appears! This is a reminder to me that there are times when acceptance and letting go is part of finding and receiving. I have been testing this acceptance and letting go technique as I go through daily life. This has translated to do all that you can minus worry and fret and let it go, wait with patience and go on with your daily life knowing that whatever happens you can and will deal with it. Excessive worry and making up stories adds anxiety to the process and prolongs it. Acceptance and letting go lays a foundation for trust and flexibility. It takes practice, it tak...

 Your Journey is Going to be Different than Others DJ Loaf Confessions on the Journey.  I have been missing deadlines and commitments on the Journey and the blog has been part of this. Truthfully, it has not been part of my make up to miss deadlines and commitments for many years. I kept commitments to myself to help and support building self trust and self value What I have learnt is building self trust and self value supports in trusting others. What I have also learnt is when I feel that I have let myself down, guilt and shame sets in, which can easily lead to a cycle of neglecting the commitments I have set for myself. From this place I am learning to feel all of my feelings, and in doing that I may have to take a pause, take a rest returning from that space with a renewed mindset, ready to go again. It can be tempting and sometimes easy to get caught up in the cycle of guilt, of not feeling your feelings, of slipping into victim consciousness and externalizing. What is i...

  Trust Yourself enough to trust your Source/Creator/God, that no matte what happens that you will be ok - Iyanla Vanzant Continuing on the Journey to Surrender. We love to fix a problem by doing. There is always in our mind something to do, to fix, to get.  When we are in a state of surrender we must give up the need to do, fix, get. Surrender requires complete trust.  If you have trust issues, you will never be able to surrender. Peace

  November, pour warmth into spaces within me that feel unworthy. fill the room vacated by what isn’t for me with something that deserves to stay. let everything that reaches its expiration date be a reminder of how love for myself should always remain priority. quench my spirit. Billy Chapata November is the Journey to Surrender. What does surrender mean to you? In the past, surrender meant giving up, and felt weak. As I journeyed spiritually, I have learnt that surrender is so far from giving up, it is the relinquishing of control, of fear, of matters that I have no business in. Surrender takes courage as it calls you to have faith, patience and fortitude. Surrendering to the Most High, the Universe has proven to be a form of strength, a miracle of sorts. It says that I have done my part, I have followed the guidance and now I must get out of the way, trusting that all will be well. Rather than interfere, worry, stress and control, I can surrender to the process knowing that I ha...

  Have you ever considered what thoughts camp out in your mind for longer times? What thoughts keep you company? Well, let's truly see. Here's an exercise that may sound like work, but could prove worthwhile. Write down whatever thoughts come to mind. Then start adding points every time you think about them. Tally for a week and see which thought has the highest points.    Mariel Busque What are you thinking? It is a mantra that I use as a reminder. What I have learnt is, my thoughts can create my feelings then feed into the decisions that I make, the mood that I am in and how I show up in the day. It starts with my thoughts, so when I catch myself in a funk, a bad mood, even when I am ill, I go back to the mantra "what am I thinking" I pay attention to the thoughts that are floating around in my mind and those that I am giving attention. Over the past few days my thoughts have been full of fear about how I am feeling in my body, I have been thinking only of the worst...

life is so much easier when you stop trying to convince folks to live in the same realm as you. just let them be and you continue to be yourself. Tonye The country has been opening up  slowly, restaurants, coffee shops, entertainment spots, schools. The biggest conversation has been who is vaccinated and who is not, what is a safe zone or not. What is safe, what is fair.  The requirements to go to any of the safe zones as declared by the Government is a valid vaccination certificate and a valid ID.  Many people have opted to not take the vaccine for many different reasons, as it stands now they are not able to visit the safe zones, except schools. Schools remain open for the unvaccinated who are at secondary school level.  The attention and emotion attached to this conversation woke me up, I wanted to see what I could have learnt from it. I have listened to both sides, I have attempted to suspend my judgement about it all and observe. The observation has yielded som...

  Live fully now. The soul reveals all information on a need-to-know basis . Danielle La Porte Lately I have found myself looking for the next thing, the next event, the next task, the next project, the next day. I realized that I was doing this when someone asked me a question about what was happening  now , in a present situation and I honestly could not answer because I was not present, I was already thinking about the future. I heard absolutely nothing that was said and could not report on it. I also noticed that when I was at an event or a place, I automatically moved my thoughts to what time I ought to leave to head home to do something else, acting as if where I was at the present moment was a bother, a means to an end, something to pass the time.  Pulling myself from the future into the present time proved to be a shift in how I started perceiving everything. Being present in the moment, I was able to immerse myself into the moment in front of me, receiv...

  I hope you have the courage and support to: Lay Down Say No Set Boundaries Walk Away Prioritize Your Health - Dr Thema A friend of mine asked me today, how do we know when to intervene in someone's life, when we see that they are heading for a fall, a crash, a crisis? I thought about it for a while and answered  when they are ready, when we are ready, the pull will be inevitable. Keep minding our own business until then, she said that is one approach. I was a little thrown by that response - confessions on the Journey. There is always more than one way, I must admit. I never thought of another one. I still have not thought of another one. What I can say based on my own lessons is helping others or intervening in their lives, if they did not ask or are not ready, it is recipe for resentment - on both sides. We are concerned for our loved ones, we want them to thrive and do well.  We want them to be happy. When we see them suffering we want to help, to make them happy. ...

  No matter what happens, or where you think an obstacle comes from, your mind will determine what you see and how you see it. If you call it a block, it’ll be a block. If you call it a challenge, you’ll see it as a challenge. If you call it a problem, you’ll have a problem on your hands. Iyanla Vanzant  What are you thinking? This must be one of the most impactful questions I have used on my Journey to Clarity. When I ask myself this in the midst of a funk and even a crisis, it stops me from making another poor move. I  am now able to take on the role of observer in the situation rather than taking mindless or harmful. Our thinking leads to our decisions. What I have learnt is, if its unconscious habitual thinking, we may dig into the past or we focus on protecting ourselves based on a memory. None of which has anything to do with the moment that we now find ourselves. When we pay attention to our thoughts, we also pay attention to our words and our actions. Our mind ca...

We find the sacred by intentionally creating space for it.  The way to invoke the sacred in our lives is to make an intentional space where we can be present, without rushing to fill that space with anything other than perhaps an offering from nature or a small vase of flowers. Lynne Twist   The ego teaches us that things like credentials, prestige, money and worldly power are more important than love. It counsels that we are separate from others, that we have to compete to get ahead, and that we're not quite good enough the way we are. And by our thinking such things, we perpetuate a world in which they seem true. Such things such as credentials, prestige, money and worldly power refer to our external selves, and our external selves are not who we are. Once we know this, we escape that world and begin to realize that we are here to love, forgive, serve and heal. "all those fancy titles and things you own says something about you, but they can never be who you are, once you kn...

  Also worth noting: “In case I need it,” is a racket. If you haven't used it in over a year… considering move it on. Other people probably need it now. Just give it away. Danielle La Porte Is there anything present in your life that you believe that you absolutely need- cannot do without?  What is in your house, your closet, your life you believe is a must keep? and more importantly is why? Decluttering, I have learnt, has more benefits than just making space in your home, your closet, your basement. Decluttering has become more than a physical clearing out, it is a spiritual process of  making room for new in my life. Decluttering is declaring to the Universe that I am ready for new. There is a readiness to move away from the comfort zone I created, an act of faith, the letting go of the familiar and control. I looked at my closet to start the process. Confessions on the Journey - I felt overwhelmed. As with life, when we view a challenge, a change as a one shot, one t...

  Collectively, we are still attached to what was even though it will never be again. Today I want to share a blog post from Alicia Rodriguez, someone I met in Ecuador a few years back. Her wisdom is on point We are all experiencing "existential angst" if you will. Our lives and everything we have ever believed is called into question every day. The ground on which we have stood is now moving and even has disappeared. This goes beyond resilience, much deeper. There is a deep and subtle loneliness within that comes from how disconnected we have become; disconnected from others, from the way our lives were and from ourselves. Collectively, we are still attached to what was even though it will never be again.  People who are in power are taking such desperate measures to retain that power so they can continue to thrive personally at the expense of the earth, future generations, and their fellow human beings. Organizations still do not empower women and diverse populatio...