What did I learn today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

If you pay attention you will always get the signs, pay attention! Learn to read your body, when you are restricted and constricted, pay attention to your gut, I don’t care what the facts say, when your gut says something aint right, it aint! And step out on faith, eyes wide open! Last night I went to see a documentary movie called Fela! Fela  Kuti is a Nigerian musician icon who was a revolutionary in every sense of the word! He stood for justice in a time where Nigeria was going through a civil war, he had 27 wives, he employed people who were considered unemployable! The guy was totally himself without fear or favour! What I learned last night is that being you, whole and totally you changes the world! It just does. You use your gift, you are free, you life becomes a demonstration of what is possible! When you are following and doing status quo you deny your own self the joy of living a full and free life! When you are doing you, you create history, a legacy! When yo...

Just start where you are! Start! Pay attention! Rev DEBORAH jOHNSON How do you have a hard conversation? What is a hard conversation? A hard conversation is one where you know that it can either piss someone off, or one where you are afraid to have, or one that you know will change everything as it is right now, after you have it things will never be the same. A hard conversation takes you out of your comfort zone, one that you have to be totally and brutally honest. A hard conversation is one you avoid! It's one that will make you cry sometimes but it frees you So how do you have these? I am learning this, Why? I don't like to piss people off, I like people to like me, I am a recovering people pleaser, I like silence, I am almost afraid of my own anger! So how do I have a hard conversation knowing all this? I ask the Universe for guidance I set the goals of what I want to achieve I am honest and open I am willing to be wrong I do it with all the love and compas...

What do you ask when a situation is happening? Why? or why? So here is what I learnt, asking why keeps you in the victim mode! Think about it for a moment! Why did this happen? Why is this happening to me? Why? oh Why? If you just take the question that you are asking and shift the emphasis in the word it brings a whole other perspective Say I AM whole and complete with an emphasis on different words and see what happens, do that even with your whining question. like why does it never turn out right? change the emphasis focus on never and you will see its not true, NEVER?? NEVER?? You get me? Shift from victim mode! So how can you move from why to why not? Peace!

I forgive myself for judging myself so harshly.  I forgive myself, for not fully utilizing and maximizing the grace of time, talent and skill that has been gifted into my hands. I forgive myself for playing small and not stepping up as a star player in the game of life. Inner Visions Worldwide I was asked to be a feature speaker at an event in Princes Town of Friday, a public speaking and poetry competition for the young people in the area. I still get humbled and nervous when people ask me to do the talk! I didn't ask many questions about the event, sometimes that gets me more nervous! I asked the venue, I am from the South of the island and have an idea of the town but its not an intimate knowledge so when I get there I see the event is on the Promenade, which is the equivalent of the town square! The middle of the town, chairs and chairs, a huge stage OMG!  Well here you go Miss Akosua, some call me Yaki! I always wanted an opportunity like this, well here it is! So ...

You see, unless you create a cause with your natural energy through expression, you cannot have an effect. Your energy is expressed or invested and the yield is your return in the form of visible supply. How do you express your energy? Your very Essence? John Randolph Rice These days I have been reading John Randolph work a whole lot, he has some radical ideas about abundance and abundance consciousness and its really resonating with me as I learn more about allowing abundance into my life and into my mind! This morning as I was reading it I was thinking about how much we block our own blessings by the way we speak, think, and who we choose to surround ourselves with, and I started paying attention to me and my triggers! Its really sobering when you face yourself and at the same time its exciting because I get to learn new lessons and apply them to this one and only wonderful life that I was gifted with! Today I was asked to be a feature speaker at a youth symposium in Princes Tow...

"Out of yesterday's rejection, onward to a new perfection, from a fire came a feel, from that feel we made the steel!  So now we children now have a form so very Trinbagonian of course! Out of a muddy pond, ten thousand flowers bloomed" David Rudder The adventure continued yesterday, I met an old buddy of mine, known her forever, but really have to make the time to hang out with her a little more while I am In the country. We decided to go to an event just on the spot called the Unconquered series. Its a set of talks held on different topics! No clue what was about to happen! The thing turned out just what I needed after having a day like yesterday! This young man from one of the "hot spots" in the country ( the new term for a ghetto in T&T) sought refuge from the ghetto in a pan yard. A pan yard is a place where steel pan is learnt and played. Back in the day playing the steel pan was frowned upon and considered an absolute waste of time! He loved the ...

You cannot hold onto the old all the while declaring that you want something new. The old will defy the new; the old will deny the new; the old will decry the new. There is only one way to bring in the new. You must make room for it Neale Donald Walsh So yesterday I was talking about adventure, and just how the Universe responds I have been having an adventure of a day! Woke up as normal did my meditation and journal writing and was about to write the blog and the electricity was gone! I started getting flashbacks of Kampala! I called the company, they told me that I was cut for non payment of my bill! What?? But I paid the bill last week through online banking! Sorry but you did not pay the current bill. But I haven't received the bill! Sorry but if you have any queries you can take it up with the customer service department in St James! I stood there feeling like a dummy! Ok this ought to not happen again, especially since my house has turned into a pit stop on a cou...

Don’t settle for a day that’s just like the day before. Make the decision and make the effort to put some real adventure in it. Ralph Marston This morning I was meditating, and just as I was done I walked outside to watch the rain and this question popped into my head and would not leave me ever since "What is the meaning maker in your life?" Confessions on the journey, I have no idea what this question is asking me! "What is the meaning maker in your life?" I think I better go and meditate some more! LOL! What gives my life meaning? I think right now the answer to that is knowing that I am living an authentic life and taking whatever lessons that I have learnt and sharing it in my own authentic way, some people it will resonate with and some it won't and I am pretty ok with that! What gives my life meaning is knowing that I am honouring the responsibility that I have to those who came before me and being proud of having the ability to do that! What ...

Cultivate a longer view of time:  Forget 'getting somewhere in a year', build your life's work. Chela Davidson One more book signing under my belt, brutally honest, every time I do one of these I'm sooooo nervous! So I tried something new this time I read from the book! Never did a reading in the past 5 that I have done and just as I predicted, started to cry! OMG! I was crying and I cry ugly, lips quivering, nose running the works!!! I kept telling myself get it together, get it together! I managed to pull it off but boy oh boy I had to pull out all the lessons! Don't judge yourself, be you, be compassionate to yourself! I had a really good time despite the ugly cry! The crowd was brilliant! Two old work colleagues showed up and that topped it off for me! I haven't seen one of them in years and I kept promising to see her and it never happened! She looked great! mellow and calm compared to last time we met! Always had a soft spot for her! The staff at the...

What you  stop doing  is just as important to your success as what you start doing Planning moves ahead swiftly for Saturday, this is the first time that I will be without my crew who handles everything and my mother is also out of the country! I saw yesterday all the hard work that they do behind the scenes to ensure that each event runs smooth! I went to the planning meeting yesterday and was like wow! I give thanks to my crew big time! So new experience, getting a stand in team, learning about the logistics and then showing up and showing out! I'm ready, I'm excited and I am grateful So my question to you is, how many people behind the scenes contribute to you and your show, making it awesome? Your "show" can be your job, your home life, an event. How many times have you taken for granted the team? You just show up? The importance and the value of the backup singers in the show is immense! Lesson learnt! Peace!! Come down if you can!! https://www...

  Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. Flee from hate, mischief and jealousy. Don't bury your thoughts, put your vision to reality. Wake Up and Live!" - Bob Marley , iconic musician Working on a book signing event for this upcoming Saturday at the National Library of Trinidad and Tobago, who graciously invited me to come and spend the time with them reading and talking about my journey! I am truly grateful for the opportunity So as I am going through the planning, I lend a friend of mine my car, with some hesitation I might add , as this friend got into an accident with my car before and that was that! Anyways, I get a message, the friend has had another accident! I'm like "no way" ok ok what's the lesson here? I am still processing it! I'm happy that my friend was not hurt, I am happy that everyone is alive, I am confused as hell now on what the lessons are in t...

One of my friends told me that I was being harsh and inflexible on a particular issue! When he said it I was struck silent! Why? because he was right! I have been silently being a passive aggressive coward not saying anything and acting out by being harsh and inflexible! I said wow, you know what? you are right! He responded, please girlfriend you are only human! Don't even beat up on yourself! Don't chase ideals: Whatever perfection you see out there isn't real. In everything there is pain because in everything there is change and when there is change, there's longing, attachment and loss.   Chela Davidson I was at first ashamed to have acted like such a jerk but at the same time I was proud to not take a defensive position and cuss his tail out!! Have you ever been there? Where someone tells you something and you know that you know that they are right? Then you have to decide, ok how do I respond? notice I said respond and not react? Responding is an em...

I'm asking myself today: Is this relationship, activity, thought or belief for my highest good? Is this relationship, activity, thought or belief a wise energy investment? Does this relationship, activity, thought or belief enhance or deplete my light? Do I wish to integrate this relationship, activity, thought or belief into my being? Does this relationship, activity or belief contract my energy through fear or expand my energy with love? What are you asking yourself? Peace!

The only place you can be is  here ," said Kali. "Now, 'all you can do' is what it means to 'give it your all.'" While I was away my mother called to let me know my cousin died! I heard what she said but it didn't make sense! I said I will deal with it when I get back! Being an only child, my cousins were like my brothers and sisters, we grew up very close in the same house and had a childhood together until the families went their separate ways, as we grew up some of us got closer and I decided to pull away from this cousin, because I didn't agree with some of his life choices! When I heard he died, my own guilt surfaced on how I reacted to what he chose to do with his life! I stopped talking to him a long time ago just saying hi at family gatherings having been like brother and sister! I got home just in time for the funeral and resolved to not cry! not be emotional, well scrap that, the Universe had other plans! I got there and it all c...

Why wait to find it in the future, or believe it has been lost already, or was never there?" . All that we need do to discover its reality is to look for it within ourselves, where it has always been ACIM So I was asked to come to Grenada to facilitate two workshops with rural business owners, to chat with the business owners and the business support agencies! I prepared the agenda, the presentation (power point of course) the material and got there! They took me to the venue, a beautiful part of Grenada, an once used cocoa estate where they are doing all sorts of awesome stuff like growing organic food, making goats cheese and yogurt, chocolate bars and all that lovely stuff! I ask for a projector and they tell me without batting an eye, there's none! Oh oh! No projector? Nope sorry! Time to get creative! The session actually went well, we had the opportunity to chat and get to know one another. Day 2 they come and tell me I have to change my entire delivery five mi...

I just had to share this, read this while I was writing in my journal this morning! It resonated with me so I thought I would share! Peace!! Mastin Kipp wrote in his blog remember that at your center you are Love, abundance and joy. You have come here not to be needy and take, but to be full and give away to the world from that place of fullness.   When you remember who you are, the desire to chase, to grasp and to yearn stops. You remember that you are a child of The Uni-verse and were created to fulfill a very special purpose. You remember that one of the great promises of Life is that you will be provided for as you walk along the path of your dreams. The fearful mind calms and the mind full of Faith emerges.   You remember that you are enough as you are and that nothing can prove otherwise, other than your own admission that you are less than who you really are.   When you remember who you really are, you surround yourself with loving people. You bask ...

Well well well! I'm in Petit Anse Grenada, It's my first time its pretty! and pretty awesome! Here for a workshop and thanks to CANARI for making it happen! Big love and blessings to Keisha and crew in Trinidad and Denyse and crew in Grenada Stay tuned for more!! Peace  

Every single day of my life is dedicated to either being a student or being a teacher . The last day in New Orleans I had the privilege to hear some of the best motivational speakers in the business, then to go to a concert after, Mary J Blige, Jill Scott, Common, some of my favourite artistes! The lessons I'm sharing: 1. Forgive everybody - doing this frees you up 2. Tell the truth - all the time 3. Be willing to be wrong because we don't know everything 4. Never give up! I left the concert, straight to the airport, and my luggage never arrived! Man, those lessons came back right away! I'm off to Grenada today minus my luggage but its all good! Loving the lessons! Peace!

Checking  in with some photos! The beat goes on today! Have a great weeknd peeps! What did I learn today? I’m in New Orleans at the 20 th Essence Festival! It’s hotttt and it’s scorching as well!   I sat today taking in all the speakers and   I realised that The elders spoke of the race not being for the swift The speedy The, gimme gimme more The, I want it now The, I want to use all of it now And I also believe that the race is not equally for the: The lazy The put off’ers The not now The I want it all but want to do nothing No, the race is for those who face chaos with calm It is for those who never forget that they are blessed It is for those who never stop giving thanks It is for those who find peace, comfort and tranquillity within the stillness Those who make decisions based what people think The followers It is for those who find inspiration within the stillness It is for those who show up, everyday, on purpose,...

Give yourself some adventure, some achievement, some fellowship, learning, exhilaration, and other great moments of experience. Give yourself the benefit of working with discipline and focus to tackle a meaningful challenge. Ralph Marston The place is hottttt!! I mean close to 40 degrees! Sun is out, people are out, energy is high! I'm having a mini meltdown. Confession time on the journey! I am feeling pretty intimidated now! why? famous authors, world class ones, top speakers, world class ones are here! I haven't moved much, stuck in my own head! This morning I woke up and said ok you wanted  this all the time so here it is! what's up baby girl? Baby girl said I'm scared hun! Why? What if it happens? What if you get it? Then things will change. Well baby girl, things are changing all the time so handle yuh stories please! So here I go today with love and compassion for myself knowing that whatever happens I will handle it! Stay tuned! Peace!!

Time moves forward, so get yourself moving forward with it. Make this day uniquely fulfilling, and then create even more fulfillment tomorrow. Ralph Marston Landed in New Orleans and it all came back! I love this place! My soul feels right, this is my 8th time here! There are three places that makes my soul sing, my super duper Island Trinidad and Tobago, Southern Africa and New Orleans! I guess its all the inspiration that I leave here with every time I come! There's art, music, food, respect for traditions! Just the way I like to live! From today I will be seeing all my peeps, Iyanla, Lisa Nicols, Terry McMillan, and the list goes on! Reporting from NOLA, over and out! Peace!!