What did I learn today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

What gives me the most energy when I’m doing it? Which of those things is relevant for this current moment in time? And what’s the absolute smallest thing I can do to put that into action  right now? M axie McCoy Reflecting on the last few months, I can safely say that I have questioned how relevant my skills, and my  vision is within this present moment given where we are in this world.  Why? A huge part of the life I led before the pandemic was about speaking at conferences, graduations and  other events. Where people congregated in a space to connect and share, I would show up and speak or be a part of a panel or connect in any way. Many times, I jumped on a plane to get to the spaces where I would speak to the crowd. Both of these activities have been put on hold since March of this year with no set time or period for a return to "normal", throwing me into some periods of doubt and uncertainty. It is through this time of uncertainty, I started asking myself,...

We want life to be good and to not be too difficult. This all makes sense. But it’s not realistic. We can’t know all the variables. Dan Pederson Confessions on the Journey - not long ago, I absolutely must have had certainty in my life. I needed to KNOW! When someone asked me to do something, to be somewhere, to get involved, to share my time and expertise, they had to come with the knowledge to answer my questions! I wanted certainty. I judged others on their certainly or lack thereof. I wanted to see and hear concrete plans of what was to happen, what was next, who was involved and the end result. Certainty made me feel secure. It made me feel accomplished. I felt that it made my life easier knowing what was to come. I made detailed plans and followed them with laser focus to ensure certainty. Then, life happened. Many of the plans I made never materialized in the way I planned, some went horribly "wrong" and some exceeded my expectations, some blew me away! What I did lea...

Scientists, physicians, and psychologists who have researched the relationship between stress and illness have concluded that the ability or inability to forgive affects the outcome of serious illness. People who have a forgiving nature increase their chances of recovery. Carolyn Myss There are events and people in our past that we still hold on to for many different reasons. On my own journey, I reflected that I held on to views and did not forgive because I wanted to be right. I wanted the other person to be wrong. I also believed that justice was not served. So I stood my ground until that happened. Sometimes it never does. Shall I stay mad or hold on to the pain? According to Carolyn Myss,   genuine forgiveness is a self-initiated mystical act that requires the assistance of grace to release you from the compulsive and often self-righteous chatter of the ego, which continually enforces a position of entitled anger or hurt. Many of us have been taught that once we are "good...

The fact that your intuition doesn’t explain itself to you means you don’t have to explain yourself to anyone. Tasha Bee There are many times when I want to do something, when I want to take a particular action and I share the idea with others. People start asking me questions. Confessions on the Journey - when I don't have the answers. I get annoyed with myself at first because I do not have the answers. All I know is that I am doing the thing or going to the place. When the responses come out of my mouth, many times, doubt sets in. I start doubting myself and the action. I am given reasons, rationales and justifications why it is not a very well thought out idea. It has always been a challenge for me to explain when I get a hunch, a message, a gut feeling. I have been practicing lately that when I get them I act immediately on them. I don't wait, I tell no one. When I start I share it if required and those who are on board come on board. They sometimes still ask questions. I ...

Just Be Aware - Iyanla Hello Lovies Do you check in with yourself? Do you check in with yourself and ask yourself  how you are feeling? These questions allow us to become more self aware. On this journey, self awareness plays such a critical role in guiding us during our daily lives. It is inevitable that there will be things that happen which we cannot control. There may also be events that take place where all we can do is  respond in the moment.  There will also be situations where we are called upon to give more than usual in time, effort and energy. We may also have to support others on the journey which calls us to tap into areas of ourselves that may be dormant  or overused. I have learnt that checking in with self brings us to a point of awareness which can lead us to making better decisions and learning or unlearning where we can be more of our true and highest self. Becoming self aware is the first part of healing and growth. We can only move forward when ...

Courage not only means being able to do something new. It also means taking steps to "be" someone new. Iyanla Vanzant Hello My lovies I have been away for a few days, unplugged from the technology and the rest of the fast paced world. This was by choice. I wanted to do ground myself in nature away from what had seen to me to become distractions of phone, television and noise. I wanted to challenge myself as well. I took a boat out to the islet. Boats and me are not friendly - AT ALL! As I got on the small pirouge, I asked Cleve, the captain for a life jacket. He said "oh no! I forgot them on shore, but the sea is nice today!"  Here we go! I did ask for challenges. The boat journey was thirty five mnutes. During that time I was mostly silent having an inner dialougue with myself. The talk was around convincing myself that I was able to do the ride, be safe and be courageous. I was so happy to see the shore. Happy to be on land and happy to see that the positive self ...

I am willing to see this differently - ACIM I was thinking about rejection today after having a conversation about it with a friend of mine.  According to good therapy,  Rejection  can be defined as the act of pushing someone or something away. In that discussion, it also dawned on me that rejection is one of my triggers, particularly after getting a divorce and having to face the effects of that upheaval.  The conversation pushed me to think about how I want to move forward when or if someone or something pushes me away. There are so many factors involved in others making a decision, many times, the decision has so very little to do with us, but we take it personally, and so my first lesson is: 1.  Do not take it personally- some people are making decisions based on where they are and what they know.. Some people are out to win at all cost, and others have to make the best decision for themselves in the moment. 2. Use it as a guide that my readiness to be or d...

disentangling yourself from what you've inherited requires mess. it requires chaos. it requires darkness. it also requires acceptance. it requires your intention. it requires your softest + strongest presence . Olivia Jade On Friday I drove to the South of the Island to visit my grandmoother, she lives just over an hour away from me, I must admit that over the past few months both with the Rona and restrictions I have not seen much of her. Growing up I thought she was a goddess, she dressed like one, smoked Benson and Hedges and took me to places where we ate sandwiches after speeches were made. In my eyes she could do no wrong. When I was grown I started to question some of her decisions - of course not knowing the full and entire story. I put in my two cents in and made some judgements about her rationale for making those decisions, when I did that I decided to pull away from her a bit, my expectations were shattered and I was mad as hell! When I started becoming more aware, I r...

This time has forced us to  not know . Maxie McCoy This is such a peculiar time in history, this new time is one where uncertainty has certainly been a feature in most of our lives. Because of the Corona, the predictability of life as we once knew it has gone. Many people cannot plan for the future, even for simple things. I was taught that if you fail to plan, you plan to fail. I respected that view and made a comprehensive plan for my life which was going well until it blew up like a bomb and forced me to restart. So in this time where planning is no longer a fool proof method that leads to a successful execution and outcome, many people, including me, are out of sorts. What I did learn from the uncertaintly is that half of the so called planning was based on control and fear. Wanting to make sure everything goes right, no mess ups! I also leared that there can be creativity and innovation in the meantime, in the unknown. We find new methods to live and work, some of it worth kee...

Synchronicities are always present when you learn to observe and pay attention. Dieon Every Monday we would sit together to brainstorm on how to manifest the vision for the community. Many times there were fireworks(passionate discussions) & always there were lessons! On this particular Monday, as soon as I walked in, “Madam, I have something for you to execute” Really? Do tell? So, I was thinking that we set up a toll free line for the farmers, when they are in the villages it is often difficult for them to come in to see us & we only visit them periodically, but they all have mobile phones so set it up, execute it!” Amm hello jus so? Madam, You cannot learn about yourself if you are always staying within the confines & borders of the familiar. You must step into unknown worlds which may feel unsettling, many times these are the places where you get your best lessons. Transport yourself to a place of possibilities, of living now in the vision, you will never get there by ...

I am willing to see this differently - ACIM This is one affirmation that has guided me so many situations and experiences. I am willing to see this situation differently Differently to the past Differently to the what I am seeing now Differently to what I am used to doing Differently to allow for peace Differently to allow for joy Differently to make way for new I am willing to see things differently to learn, to learn something new, something useful  I am willing to see this differently to love myself, to love period I am willing to see things differently for progress  When a situation occurs and I go into reactionary mode, I remember this affirmation When something triggers me, I tap into this affirmation When I want peace in a situation - I tap into this affirmation I am willing to see this differently because it advances progress. Peace Have you read any of Akosua's work? What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You...

Sometimes we second guess ourselves and stay in expired circumstances. Going forward, reclaim your time by trusting the voice within. Dr Thema How many of us use the guidance within? And if you don't know or believe that we all have inner guidance, I am here to tell you, think again. We do! Whether we use it or not. We all have that small voice within us, to ask us questions and to guide us. The challenge is when the voice leads us into the unknown and the illogical based on where we are. I am here to tell you again - most times the voice does that. It shows up time and time again when we are off path, off purpose What I have learned is, the voice is drowned out with the noise of busyness, with the noise of external voices, with the noise of habit. To tap into the voice within brings courage and clarity and authenticity and faith. We have to be courageous to go into the unknown, to have faith to trust in the unknown, to be our true selves. The voice will always be there when you a...

Happiness is a Choice I have a sign up on the wall where I live, as soon as I enter the stairs,the sign says " Do something everyday that makes you happy" I deliberately put the sign there as a reminder to self that life is more than work, fixing probems and routine. There must be a balance.  Putting yourself first must be a priority, we are talking taking care of your needs in a way that makes you useful to both yourself and to others. Have you ever asked yourself what makes you happy? What brings you joy? And actually do them? without feeling guilty?  without questioning why? Do it and see what happens to you, your mood and those around you when you show up in joy. Joy is an inside job. It surpasses happiness which can be dependent on circumstances. Joy says even in the moment I know, I just know this will pass and I can return to a space of something good. When you treat yourself you say to the Universe that yes, I am worthy, I am valuable, I am preparing myself for that y...

dear july, you are a month of abundance, of healing, and breakthrough. you may come with challenges, but you will teach me strategy. you will gift me with good and show me new ways to serve. thank you in advance. Iman Europe July is the month of Confidence. Dear Self. As you enter this new month of this incredible year, summon all of your courage. This here time calls for it. I anticipate that there will be more shifts coming, More decisions to be made on who will remain in your tribe & how much of what you believed was true was really false. More choices on what is truly important as one who's crown was paid for by blood sweat tears & death. Suit up. You will be held accountable for all of your actions. You got this! Let's do this. Confidence to speak the truth Confidence to live the truth Confidence to take a stand Confidence to trust Self Confidence to Show Up Confidence to Listen Confidence to Empathise Confidence to Learn Confidence to Share Confidence to Love Co...