Triggers
Do you know what your emotional triggers are?
Emotional triggers are reactions to events which usually cause fight, flight or tension. They are unresolved issues, matters and challenges which we carry around sometimes unconsciously. We sometimes bury them, deny them, ignore them for fear of hurt, retribution and rejection.
We all have triggers, it really is about how we deal with them when they come up, oh and come up they will!
When we are triggered, many times we feel that we are being attacked. With that belief the natural response is fight and flight. That signals to us that we are protecting ourselves and what we care about.
Many of us walk around carrying challenges and issues from way back when. With little resolution of these issues and challenges, when we are triggered the natural reaction is to protect ourselves. Many times the reactions are habitual or addictive.
I have been paying attention to what triggers me, I have self analyzed that my triggers are:
1. Abandonment - When I believe that someone will leave, I act out! or I would leave first.
2. Anger - anyone that shows anger and rage around me, I feel so uncomfortable, I refuse to also show my own anger and rage around others.
3. Rejection - my word! this is the biggie! I think this is my biggest trigger.
4. Being ignored or dismissed
5. Being around needy people.
Now that I have recognized these triggers, I can move accordingly. I can take the necessary measures to respond, learning their origins, and how I usually respond to them, not the habitual or addictive responses that usually happen.
The major lesson is remembering that the pain does not go away if it is denied, ignored or substituted with something temporary.
I have learnt to be patient with myself, show some compassion and remember that it takes time to form new habits.
Peace
Akosua
Have you read any of Akosua's work?
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