What did I learn today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

  Whatever we do, there is the undeniable fact that we will always be held accountable. Carolyn Myss I have been thinking about accountability and what it means to me, particularly because I believe that we are all connected in some way and our lives are our own to shape with the guidance of the Most High. Accountability  I have learnt is taking responsibility for my actions, it is acting with respect and integrity- first to self and then to others - accountability can be seen rather than a punishment bus as a guide, a code of conduct to ensure that I treat myself and others with honor, grace and reverance. How do I respond to situations that come up in my life - especially those that are out of my control. How do I act when I give my word? How do I show up for myself when the going gets tough, how do I show up for others when the going gets tough for them? How do I show up for difficult conversations? Accountability I have learnt is that I must recognise the value that I hold...

" There's a difference between being liked and being valued. A lot of people like you, not many value you" Adam A  Value You with... Your time Your thoughts Your money Your authenticity  Your Friendship Your relationships Your dreams Your Love of Self Value You What I learned is there is a difference between feeling a sense of value and being special. Special leans on external validation, receving accolates, looking for others to affirm you. It lead me to "performing" and in many of those performaces I was out of balance. Why? Because I was seeking everything from outside of me With value - its internal. I am valuable no matter what! As an idea born out of the mind and love of the Most High, I am vaulable, I need to only remember that in any moment and that propels me to act with love and value myself minus any outside validation What a freeing thought Value You Peace and Blessings Akosua's Books Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here? Now What? The Flipside What D...

  The only constant variable in life is the unexpected Everything changes, everything. The lesson with recognizing this is has been to let go of the need to control, to grasp, to sit in the illusion of comfort and certainty. So what do we do when the change comes? Preparing for change is such an important part of the toolkit of life that without that preparation we can become stuck. What I have learnt is with acceptance, with letting go, with the knowing that change is nothing personal, navigating it becomes easier.  As the Course in Miracles says " Are you willing to see things differently" I must confess, change for me over 2023 was tough. I wanted what I wanted, I worked for it, I prayed for it, I got it so why would it no be different, why should things change, why should I change? Everything changes, I had to remind myself to be ready, be prepared by focusing on the now, being in the moment. Through acceptance, through letting go, through the practice of faith and the wi...

  Allow yourself to have the feeling without resisting it, venting it, fearing it, condemning it or moralizing about it This has been a year of learning about radical acceptance and letting go. Both concepts have been a journey of unlearning, trusting, courage and feeling all the discomfort around it. These are the top six lessons I have learnt from Radical Acceptance and Letting Go 1. Nothing is wrong with you when other people cannot meet your needs or show up for you. Sometimes people just chose not to, cannot or don't want to based on where they are. 2. Letting go of the ones who aren't able to show up for you creates room for those who can. 3. Our ego loves to remind us that we are not in control and  that is not where we must be - we must always be in control and so when we listen we look for all type of ways to be in control.  4. Healing involves feelings - letting them rise up and pass through us rather than suppressing it  5. Letting go is a natural ability ...

  May your higher nature lead, whether you are protesting, manifesting, marching, organizing, planting seeds, speaking truth, raising awareness, holding the vision, healing your heart, keeping the peace, deconstructing the old systems and building the new  that will be born - Maya Hasnaa Our higher nature is always guiding us, speaking to us, leading us. It is not intrusive, it waits and what I have learnt is that it never judges us. It speaks in whispers. When we get still, lessen the noise of busyness and other distractions we are guided.  There is nothing that we can hide from the Universe, mistakes and missteps happen, it is part of the Journey- the acknowledgement of it supports the transition to the other side. When me make excuses, justify, and rationalize them it takes a lot longer to transcend them. Guilt sets in busyness and distraction becomes the norm. Change starts within- it really is an inside job. A huge part of the living from our higher nature ...

 What are the things in your life you’re most afraid of doing that would probably be good for you? What are the possibilities in your life that make you uncomfortable? What ideas are you avoiding or emotionally rejecting? Mark Hanson  Today, I am making a commitment to do something new that scares me. This year I started by driving to the beach every week. I would not go to the beach because I was afraid of driving on the road to get there. Its a ling winding narrow road, with cliffs and drops. The views are breathtaking however I was always thinking that I may not be skilled enough to traverse those roads safely, so although I loved going to that particular beach, I would not go until someone offered to drive. I had the great fortune of being driven to the beach on request, that relationship ended and I had to ask myself - shall I wait on someone to do the things I want to do because of fear? I resolved to give it a go and here I am months later with a routine and the abilit...

  Let’s talk about this relentless pace we’re all caught up in. The never-ending to-do list, the constant race to accomplish more. It’s like we're all sprinting a marathon. But here's the thing: life isn’t just about chasing tasks or racing against time. Science backs this up – rest and play are the secret to a healthier life. Nawal Mustapha  As the 2023 calendar year winds down, I am in a reflective mood. I really want to rest and play and honor myself through that process. There are many demands on our time along with the feeling of wanting to prove ourselves/our worth to everyone, wanting to prove how strong we are and in control. These demands can push us to say yes when we really want to or must say no. This process can lead to resentment, guilt and shame. We have to practice setting up and keeping boundaries, we have to practice honoring ourselves and the process. We have to practice showing up for ourselves. According to Iyanla Vanzant," if you are at a place in yo...

  We have to figure out which areas of life we’re going to lean into and which ones we need to table or ask for help with because we can’t do it all. Certainly not by ourselves.   Needra Glover Tawwab Many of us are rewarded for working hard, for being busy, for always saying yes and being on the go. As much as we like to feel useful, helpful and have good intentions, our lives can be taken over with demands and schedules which may not translate into a healthy way of living. Our bodies respond to burnout.  Our minds respond to burnout. Our souls respond to neglect. There is no way around it As much as we "push through" there is a limit I am learning that saying yes to everything is unsustainable and can lead to resentment and anger  I am also learning that asking for help in not a sign of weakness. It can open so many other doors and lessons.  It has become a practice to say no when its rooted in people pleasing and external validation - takes self awareness It ...

  Your Greatest Offering is not always something you do; most often it is the person you become- Briana Wiest  Confessions on the Journey - Uncertainty scares the beJesus out of me. I want to know and I want to know now. I want to be told the why, how, if's and buts. I have learnt that there are many times that wanting to be sure of everything is a way that I attempt to keep myself safe. I want to be in control to ensure that things don't go out of control The biggest lesson I have learnt about control is that not only is it an illusion.  Attachment and the craving to control, which are intertwined with ego, also stand as roadblocks that each individual has to gradually undo if they want to enjoy a peaceful and fulfilling connection. There are infinite ways for the Universe to bring you want you need, what you want. There is no need to control anyone and anything. There is something in the Uncertainty that we can tap into  The Uncertainty is the price of admission t...

  "The truth is that you already are what you are seeking. You are looking for God with his eyes. This truth is so simple and shocking, so radical and taboo that it is easy to miss among your flurry of seeking.”  – Adyashanti Hello my friends, its been a minute! How have you been. Life has been life-ing, it truly has been a time of healing, learning, unlearning and radical acceptance.  I wanted to share some of the unlearning that have come up for me during the few weeks. 1. The Most High is in everything that we do, whether it looks like it or not. The Most High is a breath away and awaits our invitation to step in - I leant that the Most High was somewhere up the sky, outside of me and far away only to return in times of need. 2. Radical Acceptance is a practice - a practice is where one has to take action consistently  3. Radical Awareness is fully accepting things as they are, instead of ignoring, avoiding, or wishing the situation were different, 4 Healing is c...

  Allow your imagination to be the blueprint of your desired life Maybe you should trust in divine timing - One of my favourite sayings is everything in time, on time, all the time. Maybe you should trust in the Universe - the coming together of everything designed to guide and protect you Maybe you should trust your intuition - even if it seems to go against what you believe you want and need Maybe you should trust the signs - I mean why not? Maybe you should trust the goodbye's when the flow is for forced. Maybe you should trust yourself - God lives in you Maybe you should trust in what is working and what is not so you can choose Peace and Blessings Akosua's Books Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here? Now What? The Flipside What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love  

Feel because what exists inside the feeling state that you are avoiding is information - Briana Wiest Over the past week I have been at a Knowledge Fair. Practioners from all over the world had the opportunity to share their experiences on working with Gender Based Violence (GBV).  What stood out for me sharing our experiences is how many of the people in the room continued or even fought to remain  "professional" in the midst of hearing emotional stories. It made me think about how much we are asked to "be strong" which translates to don't show feeling, no crying, no emotions, take it on the chin. How can we be human and deny the fullness of the human experience? How can we show up in a room not being our full selves? Having been asked to do that repeatedly, especially as women, it becomes tough to navigate the world and show up without being given the space to be fully present in our authentic selves. There was a story being given by a GBV survivor, an emotion...

God gave you a mind to think with & a heart to love with, marry them together & make a difference in this world. Guided Revelation Four days into the Journey to Self Reflection and boy oh boy things have been coming up that I have been laughing, screaming, chuckling and shaking my head at some of the decisions and choices that I make out of habits, fear, comfort and old tapes. The intention of this month for me is to reflect on the decisions that I make, and hold myself accountable for them. To pay attention to the times when I am making decisions based on the past, patterns, remaining comfortable and fear. And how do they impact my life. I am ready to do something new and doing something new requires being mindful, taking action and not repeating mindlessly what I do expecting the a different result. This approach has been  stripping me of everything that I think I am.  What I have learned is: 1. You are able to see things differently when you "do your own thinking"...

  Self -I Love You and I am Listening - Sarah Blondin #Affirmations... #Intentions... As I begin this new month, I will be mindful and intentional about the words I use. Words pave the path to the road of the lives we create. Words have power. I will use the words coming out of my mouth to create intentionally. As I begin this new month, I will recognize the feelings that I have flowing through me. Feelings are guides.  Feelings must be felt in order to transcend where we are to heal. Feelings buried alive do not die, they bleed out. As I begin this new month, I intend to be mindful of the thoughts I allow to occupy my mind. Thoughts pass through like clouds, like waves - which ones will I allow to linger? Just like words, thoughts create. I sometimes get lost in the ones that say I must do more, I must be more, I must win - sometimes they torture me if I am not careful. Be mindful of the thoughts you hold on to consistently - they manifest itself in your lived experience...

  Catching the sunrise is grace - Garlene Hicks Seeing the sun rise, especially over water - excites me yet calms me at the same time. I feel a sense of renewal when I witness it. The process says to me - here is a new day and its started beautifully. What are you going to do? I - sunshine- just set the tone, will you follow or will you not? Sunrises also taught me about consistency, about the power of silence. There is no fanfare, the sun rises daily, usually around a similar time and just shines. No awards, no huge announcement - the sun just shines. Sunrises teach me to show up daily, no matter what! Peace and Blessings Akosua's Books Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here? Now What? The Flipside What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

 if we don’t continually outgrow ourselves, if we don’t wince a little at our former ideas,  and beliefs, we ossify and perish .  Maria Popova Yesterday I was having a conversation on healing -  mainly inner healing. Confessions on the Journey - I want to heal super fast-  I run from uncomfortable feelings and being vulnerable . With healing, there is no way around it, one must go through.  With healing - we must sit in it. Whatever comes up, we have to sit with it, invite in in, get curious and simply deal with it. Healing requires patience. The patience here where how we go through can be more critical that the time.  Healing requires forgiveness, including forgiveness of self..  According to Maria Popova, forgiveness is the alchemy by which the shame transforms into the honor and privilege of being invited into another’s darkness and having them witness your own with the undimmed light of love, of sympathy, of nonjudgmental understanding. Heali...

  Don’t place limitations on yourself when you think about your next chapter. Let your mind reach far and allow your sight to be oriented by your deepest aspirations. Yung Pueblo   The end of 2023 is almost upon us, I started a ritual a few years ago where I would take time at the end of the year to go within, reflect and envision how I would want my life to look and feel for the next journey. I was thinking about how much I limit myself in the dreams and visions of how I want to live when I reflect. So when I saw the quote from Yung Pueblo which talked about placing limitations on ourselves, it resonated. On the journey to unconditional self love I have seen how impactful and powerful our thoughts are, how much our words and actions stem from the thoughts we think.  I am making a commitment to myself today to think without limits, to focus my thoughts on the fact that whatever comes my way I am able to handle it, to flow with the flow and to come through it on the o...

  H ere are my top 3 tips to stay engaged even when life is lifing: Give your peeps a heads up when you'll be hard to reach so they don't worry. Set reminders to check in if you're prone to disappearing. When overwhelmed, say that - don't just go silent. People understand. Stacey Hererra  I was chatting with a friend today, she said something that made me sit up and pay attention.  She said "Self Isolation can become unhealthy."  Why did that resonate with me? I spend  A LOT of time alone. even more so when I am going through life's challenges, the ups and downs of what we called lifing. I had to ask myself when she said it, am I self isolating in a healthy or unhealthy way? What do you mean by that? She said its all in the intention. Are you running or are you healing? There are times I would go somewhere for a few days, no phone! sometimes to get away from it all and sometimes to go inside myself to be centered. Having that conversation brought me to the...

  When we can’t forgive ourselves, we remain imprisoned and separate from our world. Tara Brach On this Journey of mine to love myself unconditionally, a recurring theme from all the books, guru's people I have met and spiritual coaches is about forgiving ourselves first. Before any attempt is made to do, to be, to fix- forgive self first! I always wondered about that because in my mind, well what did I do wrong that requires me to forgive myself? My ego was screaming to me that there is nothing you have done that requires you to forgive yourself. I feel for it. I fell for the ego trip and truth be told that had me stuck! I kept the focus on others, wanting them to say sorry, wanting to show them that they were wrong, out of order, they did a number on me. That energy kept me in a space of blaming, victim hood and ego tripping. What I have learnt since changing my perspective is forgiveness goes beyond someone saying sorry and acknowledging that they did something to hur...

  T oo many of us attempt to connect with our power in all the wrong places: in complaining, gossiping, whining, doubt, or fear… the list goes on. Our feelings are part of what contributes to our power; the connection to our feelings is what influences our outcomes . Carolyn Myss There is power in the words that we use. There is power in the thoughts that we think. There is power in the choices that we make. Where do you place your power?  I started paying attention to this more and more, starting with the little things. When I go out for a run or for a hike, I pay attention to what I am telling myself. When I tell myself "You can do this" or "I can do hard things" even though I am sometimes in a tight situation, or suffering through it I find something extra in the tank to move on, to finish the course. When I complain and moan, the energy levels I have are depleted. It becomes a self prophecy  and a detour into fear. Imagine taking that level of power of our thou...

  Like the light of dawn, clarity that appears suddenly has been arriving all along . Maxie McCoy Whatever decision we make, even it if appears as if its instant and out of the blue, has been happening  incrementally. We would have been thinking about it, getting signs to take a particular course of action, being divinely guided in some way - asking ourselves some questions even. The clarity comes when we take a firm decision and what I have learnt is that it is always right on time.  There is no rush, you cannot lose and it happens when we have made a firm decision and is ready. Peace and Blessings Akosua's Books Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here? Now What? The Flipside What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love