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Showing posts from 2017

I declare

Declare: I no longer consent to thoughts, ideas, or beliefs entering my mind other than what comes from my soul, Spirit, Source, aspects of my higher dimensional self, or guides/teachers that are in service to my highest good. And so it is. Maryham Hassnaa

I declare an upcoming year of love and serve
I declare an upcoming year of authenticity
I declare an upcoming year of forgiveness
I declare an upcoming year of properity
I declare an upcoming year of blessings
I declare an upcoming year of service
I declare an upcoming year of fun
I declare an upcoming year of gratitude
I declare an upcoming year of content
I declare an upcoming year of progress
What do you declare?
Peace

Action and Self Belief

Trying to motivate yourself with fear is like screaming at a child, "Do something, dammit!" You'll either freeze up or act in counterproductive ways. Fear widens the knowing-doing gap. Don't use it.  Martha Beck'

How many times have you tried to scare yourself into doing something or maybe  into not doing something?

How many times did it work- in the long term?
I would safely bet to say not many times it works in the long term or work at all
Fear is usually not the best motivator to use
Nor is making yourself guilty
How many times you made your self guilty for having the nect donut, sending the text to the ex, spending too much time on social media instead of meeting your deadlines- that my friend does not work in the long term either

Action and Belief - there is it, simply that!
Take action - less talk- make the mistakes, learn as you go
Belief- believe that it can happen no matter what minus the expectations

Small steps daily - next time you open your mouth to …

Mentally Strong Involves acceting support too

Being mentally strong doesn't mean you have to be completely self-reliant.
Mental strength isn't about proclaiming that you don't ever need help from anyone, or from any type of higher power. Admitting you don't have all the answers, asking for help when you need it and acknowledging that you can gain strength from a higher power is a sign of a desire to grow stronger.
Amy Morin

Asking for help is a challenge for me so when I read this, there was a combination of laughter and head shaking! oh and there was also a few OMG's thrown in there too! 
I have been getting better and better at it and by golly it feels like progress. Sometimes there is a relapse then the Universe reminds me and nudges me "hey, you live in the world....with other people" with situations and events which scream out for my connection with others, for my accepting support from others, for my communion with others from as simple as taking a run on a weekend right up to being accompanied t…

Body Shots

I believe we create every so-called "illness" in our body. The body like everything else in life, is a mirror of our inner thoughts and beliefs, the body is always talking to us, if we will take the time to listen Louise Hay

My shoulder has been injured for going onto 3 weeks, I have been walking around nursing it. I am a firm believer that what is happening on the inside or what is happening in one's life manifests itself in one's body
So it is with a mixture of frustration and curiosity that I find myself asking myself: "self, what is going on here?" I spoke to my shoulder too "Heal thyself!!" "Now!"
So this morning with that conversation in mind I started exercising, well well well
I had to run for the muscle relaxant almost immediately, it seems like the pep talk did not work
I have been contemplating what is happening that I am not facing, that I am blocking, that I am denying that I must pay attention to
Sometimes the healing start…

No One is Out Of Place

We are all different, which is great because we are all unique. Without diversity life would be very boring.”Catherine Pulsifer
This morning I accompanied a friend of mine to her old secondary school, they invited her back to speak and take part in one of their events, recognizing her as one of the school's esteemed past pupils
As we stood there while they fussed over her, she asked to walk around the campus so we decided to take the walk. As we were walking she pointed out where her class room was, the labs and started giving stories about her time at the school
When we were finished she was quite pensive and quiet, then she said, I really did not have a good time or very fond memories of this place. In hindsight I know that many of the experiences shaped me into who I am today but it is clear now to me that I put them out of my head and as I return here today after over ten years I feel totally out of place, like I still don't belong

What happens when we treat people who ar…

Turning up on Purpose

"When I think of all the disappointments of the past I just laugh" - George Micheal


Turning up at the Institute of Chartered Accountants of Trinidad and Tobago International Accounting and Finance Conference was a combination of nostalgia and fun. I saw quite a few old friends and faces. It certainly brought back some memories of my past life and also threw up some lessons that I still have to master - ego and external validation, proving myself to others that I made a the right choice in leaving the profession, I am still at the back of the class working my way forward
The great lesson is I no longer feel guilty about leaving the "steady job" I know I am in the place where I am supposed to be.

All in all a wonderful experience, the speech went well and I took some time to have a drink after with my good buddy Tash

Peace




Returning Stronger

Image
1.shift your focus from what’s wrong to what’s possible - Iyanla Vanzant
I   I wanted to be an accountant for as long as I knew myself, I just knew I would be one. I believed it was written. And then when I achieved that dream I would live a rockstar life!
I    I studied accountancy, I was chartered and certified in the mecca of accounting - The United Kingdom I   I believed that I was a rock star, I was out there "living the life", and then just like that poof, it was gone. Truth be told, I was living in fear, I was afraid that it was too good to be true, that  I would lose it, that I did not deserve it, it was a very anxious way to love, looking over my shoulder, protecting it, hiding it. And as I learnt now every thought is a prayer, I prayed for the loss of it unconsciously.      I did lose it, spectacularly. A testatment of what lac of self belief and fear can manifest     All that to say is now that I am no longer a practising accountant, and doing what I believe ismy purpo…

The Soft Things Bend

The hard things break, the soft things bend. Of course, we are all hard and soft, stubborn and flexible, and so we all break until we learn and are battered until we accept what is before us Mark Nepo


The work is really about ourselves, what are we here to learn, what are we here to share, what are we here to develop. The moment we project and blame and not take responsibility the lessons take longer to happen and therein lies the sufferation.

How can I grow?
What is this situation telling me?
What can I do with love?
How can I create boundaries?
How can I share these lessons?
How can I forgive?

Micheal Beckwith says when we ask disempowering questions, the Universe responds accordingly
Disempowering questions include
Why me?
Why is this happening?
What are you doing to me?

So which one would you choose?

This will not mean you will be a walkover or have no boundaries, because sometimes the loving response is no, but that no will come from an empowering and kind space and will foster m…

Kind Words Taste Better

You don't have to be disagreeable when you disagree - Eckhart Tolle

We sometimes have different views.  Different experiences lead us to having different perceptions and then there is the ego! the part of us that tells us to hang on to our beliefs no matter what and define ourselves by them even if they are harming us or separating us from our brothers and sisters and most importantlyour happiness.

All that to say, we may not always share the same opinion or views. But golly, can we just disagree in a kind way? Why is that so hard? Well most times its when the feeling stems from the ego and we want to attack or defend a position. One can be extremely passionate in one's opinion and still be kind
Words, they cannot be taken back, once they leave it's source all that can follow is an apology. When they are laced with kindness chances are they taste better if you have to eat them.

So, be kind when you have a difference of opinion and want to express it to the someone else. Gi…

I aint Shame!

“Shame is a soul eating emotion.” C.G. Jung

One phrase that I have eliminated from my normal conversation is "I'm shame" or as we say here in my home country "ah shame". 
Shame according to Psychology Today, "As a self-conscious emotion, shame informs you of an internal state of inadequacy, unworthiness, dishonor, or regret about which others may or may not be aware. Another person, circumstance, or situation can trigger shame in you, but so can a failure to meet your own ideals or standards whether or not they are perfectionist. Given that shame can lead you to feel as though your whole self is flawed, bad, or subject to exclusion, it makes you want to withdraw or hide yourself. So it is no wonder that shame lurks behind addictions that seek to mask its impact"

I rationalised in my mind that not speaking the word out loud and not attributing it to me and my actions is a first step in not only working out the difference between shame and guilt but also i…

Give thanks

Wouldn't take nothing for my Journey Now - Maya Angelo


If anyone told me that I would be giving speeches and talks to people from all over the world I would laugh my head off, you know the type of laughter where you slap your leg? The one that opens your mouth and holla!

I would say no because it was not at all in my own life plans, I thought of myself as behind the scenes type of gal! The engine room. I was totally petrified to speak in front of a crowd, any crowd, even my family. I would say though that the journey to get here I would not change for the world. I became courageous, I became independent, I became someone who has a voice, I became safer in my skin. That would not have happened any other way so I give thanks for that.

The Journey is the path, that I have learnt. How I got there is the learning, what I became in the process.
Don't knock the process, trust it
Recognise that it is happening for you,not to you
and give thanks for it all
Peace

Out of the Boxes

Maybe you’re just kind of weird in a world that rewards “normal”. Too woo woo in a very linear, narrow-sighted culture. You’re doing all the good, metaphysical, motivational work but you feel like there’s a veil between you and what you really want to manifest, and if you get it, you don't get to keep it. Erase erase.

That’s the subtle but very toxic Lie of Inadequacy telling you that you’re here and what you want is way over there, on the “right” side of it all. Danielle La Porte
Today I had the distinct pleasure of being chosen as the champion of the Green Economy Coalition's presentation of the Santa Cruz Green Enterprise Declaration. A statment of intent. Countries such as Trinidad and Tobago, Grenada, Dominica, Uganda, Peru, South Africa, Cuba, Dominican Republic, Mongolia came together to share lessons and declfare their intent to share this with the world. I was pleased and happy to have read the declaration with our fellow brothers and sisters.
I felt proud to be chosen…

Am I Judging You?

“You need to hear the truth about yourself as frequently as possible, because your mind is so preoccupied with false self-images.” – A Course In Miracles

I sometimes have difficulty in being clear on the difference between being judgemental and calling a thing a thing!
A recent article I read in Psychology Today gave  five signs of being judgemental, I am now going to start using this "radar" as my yardstick in determining if I am being judgemental

1.      Making a lot of negative moral evaluations of others. 2.      Having a moral rating system that is skewed in your own favor. 3.      Jumping to negative moral conclusions about others; being inclined to believe the worst.  4.      Moving very quickly from judgments of the form "This action is morally wrong" to ones of the form "This person is morally corrupt."  5.      Acting as if you can know that what so-and-so did was wrong even though you know much less about the context of so-and-so's action than so-…

Pay Attention Inward Now

Pain is only a gift if you do the emotional and mental work to transform the pain into power. That's the discerning, conscientious part. Danielle La Porte

The definition of Pain according to the wonderful philosopher Iyanla is Pay Attention Inward NOW.  
Pay.Attention.Inward.Now
Some very powerful words in there. What jumps out at me is Inward.Now
not outward, not with anyone else, but with you Pay attention to you now I take it to be still, be open, take action, in the moment when we pay external attention - no result when we project outwards - no result when we do not pay attention - the pain gets more intense when we do not pay attention NOW - the issue is prolonged
We have to do some work, some emotional work, some mental work, sometimes some physical work, there is a part that you need to play in this learning and transformation
you have to take responsibility, it's just that simple!
Peace


You cannot lose something that you are

Give up defining yourself - to yourself or to others. You won't die. You will come to life. And don't be concerned with how others define you. When they define you, they are limiting themselves, so it's their problem. Whenever you interact with people, don't be there primarily as a function or a role, but as the field of conscious Presence. You can only lose something that you have, but you cannot lose something that you are.” 
― Eckhart TolleA New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose

I love Eckart Tolle's work, I was listeneing to a podcast by him this morning, it was such a timely reminder for me that I am not my thoughts, it also reminded me that we all have an ego however it is up to us if we identify with the ego self. His explanation of what the ego is nailed it for me
He says the ego means to be indentified with the mind, with thought, structires, opinions and points of view, to the extent that you derive your sense of self, who you are with these s…

Steppin Out

Steppin' out, steppin' out
Journey through the tunnel of love
Wisdom is respected hatred is rejected Steel Pulse (Steppin Out)

Growth and change are essential and many times painful
Painful because we as humans like certainty, control and comfort.
Anything that is shaky or uncertain gives us humans anxiety and makes us nervous.
Think about it, new job, new place to live, new relationship- we get jittery!
The need to control is real!

Right now in my life, changes are happening like a rapid force, new people are coming into my life, old ones are leaving, different opportunities are coming and others have stopped. And that shit is scary. I have no idea what is going to happen next, and what is wonderful about that scary feeling is that I am always learning and growing and delighted in the unexpected.
The toughest thing for me is when people leave my life! As a recovering people pleaser I analyse and over think the reasons. Truth be told, they have grown and changed, I may have not and vic…

Being Vulnerable is Being Open

"Vulnerability is the only authentic state. Being vulnerable means being open, for wounding, but also for pleasure. Being open to the wounds of life means also being open to the bounty and beauty. Don’t mask or deny your vulnerability: it is your greatest asset. Be vulnerable: quake and shake in your boots with it. the new goodness that is coming to you, in the form of people, situations, and things can only come to you when you are vulnerable, i.e. open.” Stephen Russell
This morning my routine was thrown off. I woke up at 5am as per usual to go for a run. I got off the bed started getting ready and could not leave the house, I lay back down on the bed and decided to sleep to get away from the dread that I was feeling. I realised that I was scared, plain ole scared to go to run. It was at that point that I realised that I never dealt with the feelings associated with being robbed last week. I automatically went into fix it mode, into finding solutions, no time to dwell!
How many…

Do Not Lose the Plot

Use questions to build your strength. You will get angry. Some days you will be devastated. But even on the days when you might fail to be compassionate, please don’t let go of what you know to be true in your bones: that compassion illuminates the darkness. Danielle La Porte
How do you respond when your point of view is in the minority? Especially when the people are seemingly more powerful? What do you do when what you think and feel are different? I was in a meeting yesterday and was totally outnumbered with my view, I started getting annoyed, I started raising my voice, I started being defensive, then it hit me I do this when I want to prove that I am right rather than listen to other points of view,  when I refuse to learn from others and most importantly when I believe that I am not being heard and losing control. Really, I am never losing control, that is ussually a perception, a view that says I am wrong.  Truth be told, there is nothing to prove to anyone, especially when you kno…

Practice Makes Masters

Every loving thought is true. Everything else is an appeal for healing and help, regardless of the form it takes ACIM

Some of the most amazing things that have happened in my life I did not plan it nor was thinking about it in that way, the pure randomness of the events still astounds me!
Have you ever had a "chance" ebounter meeting someone and they turn out to be the person you had to talk to at that stage in your life or the one who has the contacts to assist you in a project, or they lead you onto something delicious and divine?
I have realised that this happens quite a bit when I surrender the outcome being to the tune of how I want it, trust the process and relax. (of course after putting in the work)

Marianne Williamson always says the Universe is self correcting and self organising, almost like the GPS in your car, when you make a wrong turn they recalibrate and lead you back on course
Our main issues are getting out of our own way and wanting to control everything - real…

Analyse the Why

Instead of asking “what do I want from life? ” A more powerful question is, “what does life want from me?” –Eckhart Tolle

This life, with all it's seeming challenges, is beautiful. It is not only about you and what you can ezrn, get, climb. It really is about the purpose behind it. The Why?
Do you have a why? therein lies the purpose
For many of us the "why" is fuelled by fear, competition, shame and lack
newsflash- anything that you aquire based on that is unsustainable!
You may get it and have it however the peace under that will be missing
You will always be looking over your shoulder or wanting more to fill the void
Analyse your "why" what is behind it?
Chances are if standing behind your why includes love, sharing, growth, authenticity, fun, honesty, self love then there will be a lot less stress, anxiety, feelings of lack and limitations
So, take a look, analyse what is the "why" and then act accordingly
Peace

Silver Linings

“When we attach value to things that aren’t love—the money, the car, the house, the prestige—we are loving things that can’t love us back. We are searching for meaning in the meaningless.” Marianne Williamson

This morning I did my usual Sunday ritual, go to the West Coast with my buddy to run then head to the Hyatt for a peanut punch, talk  a little bit the head home to watch football.

Two lovely things happened today, I bumped into one of my favourite people who was staying at the Hyatt having come to visit for a week, she joined us as we sat sweaty after our exercise! At that point I got a message saying that my wallet, which was stolen yesterday was found with my driver's permit and identification card! I could pick it up at the police station at my convenience as someone found it and turned it in! That made me so happy, mainly because knowing that good samaritans still exist and I would avoid the inconvenience of running around to get new identification documents sorted!
Letting …

I am Not Alone

As forgiveness allows love to return to my awareness, I will see a world of peace and safety and joy.ACIM


I run almost every Saturday morning, same place, same time, like clockwork, I park in the same spot as well. Today I came back to see my car smashed, ramsacked and the contents gone! I stood motionless for a moment!
Really?
Ler me check, I walked back and forth to ensure that it was my car
Oh snap, it was my car!
The first thought was did I leave anything in plain sight only to see that all the cars around me were smashed as well! Okay then
I walked to where my peeps were parked and they immediately came to my assistance
Ok there is one positive
We went to the police station - they stayed with me
We went to repair the car - they stayed with me
Gave me cash as well
(mind you these peeps are not my friends, I just see them once a week on a Saturday we run together then say good bye I don't even have some of their phone numbers)
but they were there all the way
Grateful!

I did not…

Don't Come Around Me to Change me

It is not up to you to change your brother, but merely to accept him as he is. ACIM


The day I stopped wanting others to change was the day that more peace came into my life My shift was the choice to accept or walk away. Just that simple. We do not get to choose how people love us we get to choose whether or not we want to accept the way they love us. Would you want any one to change you? Peace

Are You Willing to Do the Work?

I'm not really into that whole, "This is gonna change your life!!!" thing ❤️ I'm much more into a, "Hey there, let's experiment by showing up for life in a way that feels radically true for you" kinda thing. I don't know what you need. I don't know what you want. I don't know what's gonna get your feet tapping, heart pumping, feelings flowing, creativity exploding, wisdom moving, and body relaxing. Buttt, YOU DO. And you knowing you, you being what you came for, is exactly what I am here for The Messy
Masterpiece

Who wants to change, transform, radically shift? Hands up?
Okay now who wants to do the work?
Hands up?

The work must be done,(sorry, there is no other way) and the work requires us to sit in it, to face it, acknowledge it, call it, own it
whatever "it" is
There goes a radical concept!
There is no amount of reading, going to seminars and courses, watching YouTube vids, sending positive messages over whatsapp and Facebook i…

Remove the Barriers

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all of the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. ACIM

This is one of my all time favourite quotes from ACIM.Your task is not to seek for love- I am love, I therefore have no need to seek it out, look for it, search for it. What I am to do is to be open and accept the love that is already there, both in me and through the every day ocurences in my life.

My task is to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it - how many conditions do we place on love? I'm not talking about setting boundaries which are healthy and necessary for self respect and respect of others
I am referring to the unrealistic expectations we place on our loving
The fear that we parade around in the name of what they should be doing, what they aren't doing yada yada yada
How many barriers do we unconsciously place on our loving? 
Denial - barrier
Unrealistic expectations - barrier
Lies - Barrier
Inauthen…

Empty Feelings

Empty denotes something negative, the idea that you had something, and now you’ve lost it. But I’ve learnt recently that empty is the lack of a male presence in my head. I am empty of worrying if he will or will not call. Empty of concern for his emotions and well-being. Empty of worry regarding his actions. This might just be called letting go, or moving on, or any number of things. But I also realised that I have reached a place where male validation, whether it be professional or personal, has no baring on me any longer. And I have grown in a world where so much emphasis has been placed on that male acceptance, that I am suddenly empty. Chronicles of Salma


So, as the Universe works, as I was talking about giving advice about relationships, I received phone call by a guy asking me to go for coffee. As I was about to politely decline, I realised this must be a sign! I said yes.
right away he asked if I was free on that same day - wow, talk about testing if I was ready. 
I said yes I wou…

I don't give advice

Changing sociological patterns, financial insecurity, the rise of technology and we women all contribute to making a fuckboy what he is today. I say ‘we women’ because we’ve been complicit in the very thing that now ails us. We’ve spent years buying into the narrative of the ‘cool girl’, attempting to be belching boys on the sofa who automatically transform into beauty queens who fuck like porn stars the minute the lights are dimmed, and it’s completely fucked up the idea of male/female gender relations. Salma El-Wardany

Having to spend quite a load of my time with young women, I always have, somewhere in the back of my head, that I am supposed to do the honorable thing, to walk my talk and be an example to the young 'uns that I am around. That also comes to mind even with the adult women that I interact with on the journey. It is a really wonderful accountability check and I would not change it for one minute. With it sometimes comes some pressure- mostly self imposed.

For whatever…

Elevate Your Mind

Everything in your life, right now, is a reflection of what you believe you deserve. Benjamin Hardy

I read this article about behaviour and beliefs by Benjamin Hardy, some home truths in there that truly rsonated and so I wanted to share it with my lovelies:


Subconsciously, you believe you are “unworthy” of anything beyond what you currently have. Unworthy to have more. Unworthy to contribute more.
Unworthy to experience more. Unworthy to connect deeper. Where do these internal attitudes come from? They come from your behaviors. Your behaviors dictate your beliefs about yourself and the world. If you eat unhealthy food, how do you think that will influence your sense of identity? What if you changed it up? What if, instead of eating unhealthy foods, you DECIDED to eat only healthy foods, just for one single day. How you act and what you do shapes your internal identity. Hence, when you make a personal investment in yourself, you create an immediate psychological upgrade. You raise the …

Maybe it is time to Forgive

The relationship between guilt and forgiveness may surprise you.
Guilt is actually a twisted or manipulative way of seeking forgiveness. It is the belief that if you inflict suffering on yourself for your choices, another will forgive you for them. This is belief keeps you in pain because only you can forgive yourself.  Gary Zukav

Any time I read Gary Zukav's work, I have that penny dropping moment. every.single.time! And like today, I hit upon his wisdom on guilt and forgiveness and I literally had to scream when the penny dropped, when the A-HA angels singed! On all levels, forgiveness is big, and forgiveness starting with oneself, it frees so many channels. Forgiveness is about freedom, it is about moving on, lessening the burden, the load and starting afresh, it is for no one else but you!
Added to that, the guilt assiciated with non forgiveness- oh man! it seeps into all our actions, eating, shopping, the job we accept and choose, the people we surround ourselves with, the bou…

Moment By Moment By Moment

Things that matter come and go, but being touched and feeling life move on, we tend to cling and hold on,not wanting anything to change. Of course, this fails and things do change. Often, we are stubborn enough to go after what we think is leaving, trying to manipulate and control the flow of life, Of course this fails too
We can't stop life from flowing. All clinging and holding on makes it worse Mark Nepo



Immerse yourself in the moment for a day, whatever you are doing be all there, fully present. See how it feels, what it does to both you and the activity or person you are interacting with
Body, mind and soul
We have a tendency to look at what we have to do next, what is on the to do list, what we forgot to do earlier, what is missing, what we will say as soon as the person we are chatting with shuts up, or maybe we will butt in

On the other hand, we may be focusing on what we forgot to do yesterday, who we forgot to cuss, what we wanted to tell our co worker or friend that we d…

Greater Need for Healing

The Worse People Act, The Greater is Their Need For Healing - ACIM

Check yourself first, how are you acting? Acting like a doofus then check yourself, something requires attention
Go ahead, blame the other person for your actions- see how far that gets you!
Go ahead blame the environment for your actions - see where that takes you
Go ahead blame the economy for your actions - see how much that adds up

Take a timeout and check yourself, get still, listen, pat attention and heal!
When you're done come outside, come in to the light and see how that feels
It really is that simple
No guilt, no beating up on yourself, no blaming and shaming
Just a does of awareness, responsibility and healing
Go ahead, give it a go
Peace


How Are You Showing Up?

Just tell the truth – it’s not what you say it’s how you show up, how you live, how you act. How you be. Susan Taylor I read something today that says words and talking are the least most effective way of communicating. That resonated with me. I had to check myself. I am one who many say  of of little words. So how am I living? How am I showing up? Am I walking my talk? Am I acting with integrity, awareness, kindness, humility, courage and love? Am I honoring my word, first to myself!  A Course in Miracles says all minds are joined, and by that it suggests that people know when you are harbouring mal thoughts about them most of the time, don't you know when you walk into  a room when people are talking about you?  Without anyone saying a word, we have a guess Also when we walk into some rooms we feel the energy, and when there is positive energy we feel empowered, when there is negative energy we feel drained- not a word was said! So, I am checking how I am telling my truth, what abou…