What did I learn today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love

Hold it all.  Cup your hands and let the world pour in.  Say yes, not no.  Yes to bounty, to the lessons, the gladness, the pain, the fleeting joy, the opportunities that your life is offering you.  Strike the buts from your very heart.  That smallness, pettiness, stinginess and fear has no place in this life you’re living.  Take this day –– this one, precious day –– and face into the wind.  Remember what the great Buddhist teacher Jack Kornfield has to say about what it is to be human:  this too, this too, this too …. Dani Shapiro The end of my tour of duty in Uganda is quickly approaching; this morning while I was meditating I felt this strong sense of gratitude come over me. What I realised after was that it was due to the opportunity that I was given to be here, to spend some time in this awesome Continent and learn so much, not just about the country and its people but about myself! I have had the opportunity to spend more time...

You will be remembered for the impact that you made in this world to your family, friends and environment, not how much work you got done . Gail Hidenoff The reality of living here is that one any given day there may not be electricity, Internet access or water. And I always keep in mind that when you argue with reality you suffer! So I have been attempting to fix something on base all day yesterday which needs both electricity and Internet, it didn’t work. This morning I got in early rearing to go, guess what? Nothing!! I opened my mouth to argue and then I remember when I argue with reality I suffer! Guess who’s not suffering today? I had time to read a book that I have been putting off reading for ages! And darn, is it good! So I am giving thanks for the time and opportunity to read and learn the art of patience!! Life in Africa, always a lesson!! Peace!!

I discovered that taking chances on others created an incredible degree of loyalty, deep intimacy and a collaborative culture. By putting faith in them, by trusting them, they brought their best work and most trustworthy selves to the table . Chela Davidson Have you ever taken a chance on someone, like at work or maybe a neighbour or a young person? Someone who people believed was a complete write off or extremely difficult or as we say back home “ a complete waste of time”? It takes some courage and conviction to take a chance on someone, because it brings up “stuff” that you have, it takes patience and persistence and self belief as many people will be quick to tell you that you are now wasting your time, energy and effort! There are people who took chances on me! I always remember in school I was just not interested, I wanted attention and would look for it in the wrong way. I attended a school that had two shifts. Morning and evening shift so I went to school from 7.45...

Creating boundaries is not about convincing someone else to behave in a way that YOU THINK THEY SHOULD . It is about YOU behaving the way you want your life to go . Melanie Evans Being in Uganda is different to where I am from in many many ways; it is indeed a blessing to me as it teaches me patience, acceptance and tolerance. It shows me a different way of life. Case in point, a random event of going to the Shopping Mall or even the Supermarket. Especially now after the incident in Nairobi. So to go to the supermarket it is an adventure! Firstly there is traffic as each and every car must be searched inside and under for bombs. After they search the car, they ask you to come out for a scan and body search. You get back into the car and drive into the parking lot and repeat the process minus the car at the entrance of the supermarket. I respect the process and these guys as I know it is for the good of everyone involved! I always have a smile on my face because I just think a...

I've been digging Kate Northrup's work over the past few months! Check this out below! Wanted to share it with you! Every time you swipe your card, every time you lay down the bills, every time your coins clink in the machine or you click Checkout, you are making a statement. We earn money based on the value we’ve provided in the world. When we’re operating in our highest, the value we provide in the world is a reflection of the truth of who we are. When we unequivocally know how worthy we are, the value we provide in the world is profound. And we get paid for it. The money you have in the bank, in your wallet, or in your pocket is a reflection of the value you’ve offered in the past. (Note: Do not confuse your net worth with your self worth. They are not the same. You are inherently worthy because you are. That’s it, period.) Money is a stand-in for what we value. It’s a made-up system for humans to trade value for value. Every time you spend mone...

The only real meaning something has is the meaning you give it . (Evolving Relationships)   Ok, so I am responsible for Gender Training and promoting Gender Sensitivity within the Company, either to the staff or to the Farmer Groups that we engage. Just to set the scene I’m letting you know what I was brought here to do!   The training groups include men, as a fact of life, Gender training ought to incorporate everyone! We were about to start, one of the men in the group asked for some tea. One of the young ladies said, “Help yourself” Well blow me down with a feather, what a hullabullo that statement caused! The man was bitter! He started to sweat! “young girl are you married?”   “No” “ and with this attitude you will never be” She was giving as good as she got     “ Sebo, have you ever heard anyone die from not getting married?” “ What?” “You women are being corrupted by these Western ideas, a woman is supposed to list...

Acceptance is what We are.  No judgment, no control, no manipulation, simply Being Love. We have been having a running debate here, what is supposed to happen, how certain people should be, how they should act, how they should behave, since the big racket. Brief reminder, there was a racket going on with a few members here where they stole an obscene amount of money and products! I, myself, have been contributing to the debate. The conversation continued yesterday as the key decision maker fell ill and had to be taken to hospital due to some raving headaches! They say its stress!   Then I got this email, you know the emails you sign up for, weekly newsletters and information, that type and just on point, the topic was acceptance!   Accept people for who they are and then make a choice! You choose how you will respond, engage, interact! I sat there with my mouth open! I knew this, I have read about this, talked about this, engage in this practice on my journey,...

Don't grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form." - Rumi , Sufi poet.   So for those who are close to me, they know that I love football and Arsenal is my team. It’s simple, football, watching football, brings me joy. I can watch it for hours, read about it, talk about it, I just love the game! So it was to my extreme pleasure to see that in Uganda they are totally passionate about the game and it is relatively easy to see the English Premier League, I paid for the package on cable to have live games for all the leagues. What that really meant is that I can watch live football almost every single day! Sometimes, I would schedule my day, or my trainings or site visits around the games to be played! One of these times was yesterday, big game on I wanted to see it live!   Left work got home fixed the scene, food-check, drinks-check,frozen yogurt-check! (don't really fancy the alcohol!!!) The game was about to start and the electricity went! N...

Drop it like it's hot...all the doubt, worry, frustration, stress and anxiety that has been robbing you of your health or causing you to lose sleep at night. Decide to live your life looking forward...not backward Les Brown, motivational speaker A Kampala jam! It is indeed an experience. There are times you have to just switch off the engine and wait! And what makes it even more interesting is the drivers who use the opposite lanes to overtake the line of cars in front of them and block the on coming vehicles, what makes it even more fascinating to me is the sight of the traffic police standing there watching it unfold! Now over the past few days I must confess that I have been cursing under my breath, I have been, in my local vernacular “toting” these feelings harbouring on resentment for driving on the roads of the city. But right on queue, just to remind me, what you focus on grows. So I get in the car, and it’s the switch off and wait type of traffic jam filled with s...

Don’t focus just on how things are – focus on how you want them to be and then get about making life the way you want it to be. Mastin Kipp http://www.trinidadexpress.com/woman-magazine/Akosua-Dardaine-Edwards-228428281.html

Beating yourself up on what you haven’t done or didn’t do has never made the new come into being! Can you have the courage right now to affirm the good to affirm what is good and take it from there, Don’t be fooled when you think you are going backwards, you got to retro fit the foundations before you start building on it. Deborah L Johnson Someone told me “ go with the flow and don’t overanalyze this situation, just feel your way through it” I must admit I can over think something until I am blue in the face. Different angles and different scenarios and here’s the thing I do it not when it comes to work, only in my personal life. I figured it out, the fear is there big time! Am I doing the right thing? Am I being a fool again? All the chit chat and monkey mind talk comes up and screams at me So when she told me this I immediately identified with it because I know she was spot on!!   I am going with the flow, it feels pretty good I must say! Let go and let flow! ...

Right now, and in every now-moment, you are either closing or opening. You are either stressfully waiting for something - more money, security, affection - or you are living from your deep heart, opening as the entire moment, and giving what you most deeply desire to give, without waiting." - David Deida , author and teacher.   David Deida’s work is simply eye opening! I was reading his stuff and kept screaming yes yes I get it I totally get it. I identified with so much of what he was saying! I am so grateful that these teachers have been courageous enough to share their work just to remind me, to remind us how absolutely awesome we are! His philosophy is simply to express who you really are! Don’t go searching and looking for completion outside of yourself whether it is food, sex, drugs, alcohol, shopping or relationships .   “ Whenever you are ready, you can stop trying to find what you are precluding and start being who you are in truth. To surrender so compl...

Money is a physical manifestation of who you are! Go within and use money as a teacher . Suze Orman What is your relationship with money? The other wonderful question was did you know that humans invented money and now we let it control us? Money is so simple, what’s complicated is the relationship we have with money and what makes it complicated is the value we put on the things that we can buy with money and that’s when the chaos comes in. You define who you are, if we let money define who we are then having little money will more than likely always makes you sad or feeling lack I know this firsthand. I approached money from a feeling of never having enough so I would save save save and deny myself thinking I was doing something good! The balance was missing! Then the proverbial shit hit the fan and I lost the job, and the other security blanket that I thought had which meant that the savings that I had was to be used for what we would call the “rainy day”. That was a to...

For negativity attracts negativity. And that which we give out is that which returns. Thought energy is a precious commodity. To give one's imagination away is to give one of the tools of manifestation away. Don't be bittered and stiffened and rotted, from the inside out. Let life flow. Breathe. Be. Become . (Natalie Stewart) I am making changes in my life. And they are long overdue. I’m taking better care of myself today. And that is long overdue.   I’m separating myself from hurtful people today. And that is long overdue.   I’m not pretending that some things, some relationships, are any different than they actually are today. And that is long overdue. With respect to social ―obligations, I’m not making more work for myself. And that is long overdue. I’ve decided that I don’t need to explain myself to anyone for any reason ever! And that is long, long overdue. I’m accepting that genetic connection doesn’t mean that people can love you or be the...

“Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself, and know that everything in life has purpose. There are no mistakes, no coincidences, all events are blessings given to us to learn from.” - Elisabeth Kubler-Ross This morning I set off to the Equator line that runs through Uganda! I decided to be courageous and drive there myself, I asked them for directions they looked at me like a mad woman! Madam you are driving to the Massaka Road alone? No, It would be me and my thoughts! Ok Madam, have it your way! They gave me directions! I set off this morning, with my hand drawn map! About 2 hours into the journey the police stopped me. It was a female cop! She asked me for my driver's permit, I gave it to her Madam, this permit is expired! What? I just got the permit in September Have a look at the date Madam I looked at the date, valid for one month! Lesson one, read official documents when given. I must admit I just put the thing away safely, didn't even give...

So, this is the lesson: be of service. Solve problems. Share yourself. Step out of self-will and open yourself up to The Will of The Uni-verse. It will squeeze your ego. It will bring you through the fires of your own fears so that all that is not in alignment with your calling is burned away. But what will be left is a pristine manifestation of your core essence. Fear will be burned away. Limiting beliefs will be challenged and overcome and you will feel at home within yourself. You will see naysayers as teachers showing you how to believe in yourself even more. Mastin Kipp Liberate the Poor Tanzania is an organisation which provides help for the needy in social, economical, educational, medical, environmental and cultural fields as well urgent relief aids in case of war, natural disasters, epidemics, famines, fire out break and similar circumstances. Liberate the Poor Tanzania work is purely humanitarian and far away from politics without any racial or ethnic distinction. Th...

Tell everyone you know: "My happiness depends on me, so you're off the hook.' And then demonstrate it. Be happy, no matter what they're doing. Practice feeling good, no matter what. And before you know it, you will not give anyone else responsibility for the way you feel-and then, you'll love them all. Because the only reason you don't love them, is because you're using them as your excuse to not feel good." - Esther Abraham-Hicks Woke up early as per normal on a Saturday to go to boxing, just as I was getting off the bed, the phone goes off! I see its my buddy Helen. This didn’t come as a surprise because I knew she had a very early flight to Germany this morning. She hits me with the news “Dominic is dead” huh?” What nonsense you telling me this early morning” “It’s not a joke, he drowned” But he’s a surfer, he’s a swimmer stop playing Then I realized that she was in a hot mess and then I start seeing messages from my other peeps! ...

A good student of Life, I show up every day, enthusiastic about every lesson. My curriculum is tailor made for me. Deborah L Johnson (one of my favorite teachers) This morning I was going through my daily practice of meditating and reading something positive before I leave the house (I've been doing this for the past 3 years and it really, for me, sets the tone on how I meet and greet the day) It might be a passage from a book, a magazine, some affirmations, whatever moves me at the time I pick it up at the time and run with it! All of this to say that on this day the reading that I chose it was like WOW! Like the Universe screaming at me. I thought I would share " While we may think that questions bring us answers, the truth is, the answer is always within the question. How do you know when it is time to leave a place, an experience or a situation? One sure sign is that you are asking the question. Chances are by the time you ask the question, you already know the an...

Instead of fretting about the way things are, develop a clear and compelling vision of how you want your life to be. Somewhere within the realm of possibility is a realistic goal that will make things much better for you . Ralph Marston   I had a moment of clarity this morning. Focusing on what we don’t want, continuing to tell the story of what we don’t want, going on and on about it just creates more and more of it! Where did we learn this? Where did we learn to moan and complain and focus on what’s not going the way we want it and on what we don’t want?   What I have learnt is that I am the co-creator of the situations in my life and that creation starts with a thought! It really is that simple! Your life reflects what you think about all day long! I decided to pay attention yesterday to what was occupying my thoughts the majority of the time. What an awesome thing to be able to change your mind, don’t take it for granted. So, focus on what you want, create th...

Forgiveness unleashes the blessing in all situations and creates the space for everything to be spiritually transformed.   Forgiveness does not condone,erase or let anyone off the hook. By separating the action from the actor,it breaks the hypnotic suggestion that that we are our “stuff” Deborah L Johnson Forgiveness is big! I have learnt that forgiveness is really for me! It truly does transform my mind to see a situation more clearly and move forward. The theft at work has damaged the place in more ways than one, the morale, the vibe around the place and of course the financial security of the place! The people, who the majority have confessed, is saying that they are not sorry that they are happy that they did it! That got me boiling, mad vex as we say home! I sat there listening to them and their justification and I thought wow, what is really going on here! As I went home I got to thinking that forgiveness   and acceptance is how I am approaching this situation...

Stop waiting for others to change. Recognize that every person has the right to be whatever they choose—even if you irritate yourself about it."   - Dr. Wayne Dyer , best-selling author and speaker   So I went to a follow up meeting yesterday to secure a deal to sell in one of the bigger supermarkets in the city of Kampala! I met with the purchasing manager, who is responsible for deciding on the products which will be on the shelf of the supermarket. Young man, we had a good rapport and then right at the end I asked him for an invoice or a quote for me to take back to base for approval. He started laughing! I looked at him puzzled! Then he said to me “Madam, what invoice are you talking about? This is cash only and the way you get the thing moving” “What?”   “Cash, cash only” and he rubbed his three fingers together! I laughed, because I thought in that moment it would be better than crying and said thank you, I will call you soon and left!  ...